Humor: Borderline Weather

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I am frozen. 

My pinkie toes have fallen off. My face has crumbled to dust. My skin has peeled from my fingers. 


The next day, I am wet.

My sweater has soaked up more than just heat and sweat. My shoes have become hell on earth, torturing me with every step.


And the following, I am dry. 

My mouth has become a desert. My face could only hold so much UV radiation. 


Thrice forward, I am blown away by 7 mph wings. 

My hair resembles Trump's. My clothes can only hold on for so long. 



I hate California weather. One day, you are clear. Next, you have urges to knock down a palm tree. Like, what the heck? Make up yo god damn mind already. I'm REALLY tired of dressing up differently for every day of the week, just because you aren't stable like any of the other 200 countries on this earth....

Wait.

Is everyone going through this same thing? If so, I take that back. If that's the case, I blame Climate Change. 


I honestly don't know anymore. I can't deal with this weather. 

Anyone else have their fingers chopped off yet?




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