Leavitt Stafford and the Awful, Terrible, Not Very Nice Plan.

Chapter the Twenty-First: The Warning

Montague had, in recent days, felt rather frightened, though nobody seemed to know of this. After all, he was not one to reveal his emotions, both as a result of him being unaware of how to do so and of him not enjoying doing so. What was to say the infant would not continue its iniquitous deeds? Should anybody discover his secret, he would have to flee. If anybody were to discover his secret, the manner in which he would be treated would cause him to wish to climb out of the anatomy in which he was encased.

Once Marjorie had left, Montague had experienced quite some difficulty in explaining how he had... brought forth the voice which he had attempted to disguise. Of course, he had procured the explanation of how he was hermaphrodite, which was an explanation which he had formed, should such a day come. However, Jack and Dorothy, momentarily breaking free from their usual melancholy silence, had then proceeded to inundate him with questions as to how hermaphrodite individuals would behave, how common they were, and whether they would decide whether to live as men or women. Fortunately, Magnolia had informed the children of how it was unacceptable to ask such questions, and she had insisted that they apologise to Montague immediately. Afterwards, the questions ceased, though Montague heard the children whispering theories to one another.

Lying was an act which Montague deemed immoral, and he would ordinarily value honesty far above what anybody else cared to think. In such a dreadful predicament as this, however, it was of utmost importance that he cast his morality aside in order to preserve his way of life.

On the morning in question, he had awoken from a sleeping position in which he discovered that he had crossed his legs in the air as he slumbered. This was not unusual in the case of Montague, for he would many a time sleep in the most absurd positions, and it was not uncommon that Magnolia would awaken to find her husband having draped one leg over her shoulder whilst the toes of his other leg dug into her thigh. On occasion, Montague would even awaken to discover himself draped over the side of the bed!

Perhaps it may also be of interest to you to know that the couple snore rather loudly.

Montague wiped the sleep from his eyes and reached for his spectacles, watching as the haze of the room transformed into a clear environment, albeit rather dark, for the sun was only beginning its descent up the horizon. Of course, the first thing he must do was dress himself, for he could not allow his dishonesty to appear implausible.

Montague made his way towards the wardrobe and promptly extricated the day's garments: a pair of boxers, a white shirt, a beige gilet, his familiar green coat and trousers, his brown bow tie... and a corset. He placed them upon the stool before the dressing table.

As he unbuttoned his nightgown, he kept his eyes affixed to the wall, the expression upon his countenance appearing terribly choleric. In recent days, he had felt not merely displeased by what resided upon his chest, but thoroughly repulsed. As he grabbed ahold of the corset, he briefly wondered if perhaps the role of a surgeon would have been more appropriate for him so that he could surgically remove... them. But alas, his passion laid with architecture, and he was most unwilling to cast his love for the designing of buildings aside.

In the process of the tightening of the corset, Magnolia began to stir. "Be careful with that corset, dear," she told him groggily.

Montague, in the desire to be rid of any external appearance of a bosom, had secured the corset rather tightly, and was now feeling as though he was being crushed. He turned his head and gazed at her intensely. "Please do not speak of this too loudly."

Magnolia yawned and hoisted herself away from the bed. "Goodness gracious, I wish I could sleep all day!" she complained, and she made her way towards Montague. "Turn around, darling."