-this december-

-chapter 23-

December 4
Butters POV

i walk home with kenny, like normal, but instead of holding hands and chattering away, we walk in silence, hands shoved in pockets.

we reach my house in very little time and i tell him to wait on the porch. i need to make sure my dad isn't home. i open the door and peak my head in.

the house looks relatively clean; there's no more beer bottles or dishes scattering the floor.

"hello?" i call out.

"oh, butters!" my mother steps into the living room. she smiles sadly. "your father is away for a while, kenny may come in."

i nod and motion for him to follow him inside. "you can go up to my room and set your stuff down," i say, then turn back to my mother.

i can get a better look at her now. she looks tired and worn down and-

there are bruises ringing her neck. in the shape of fingers.

"mom!" i cry out.

she grimaces slightly. "i know, sweetie. it's ok." she tries to sound cheerful.

"mom, did- did he do this to you?" i know the answer will be yes, but i ask anyways.

she stiffens, looks away, and nods tightly. "you don't have to worry about me, dear. i'll be alright," she mumbles.

"this isn't ok," i tell her, because i don't know what else to say.

she smiles again. "why don't you go on up with kenny?"

i want to say more, to do more, but i don't know what. so i go upstairs.

"woah, babe, are you ok?" kenny asks, looking worried.

"i want to kill him," i mutter through gritted teeth.

my boyfriend blinks. "who?"

"my dad."

he frowns. "is- is he the one that..." he motions to my bruised cheek.

i nod. "he, uh, found out about you and got pretty upset. i told him to shut up and he-" i take a deep breath, the awful memory playing again in my head. "he hit me," i finish.

before i know it, kenny's got his arms wrapped around me. "i'm so sorry," he whispers in my ear.

i hug him back tightly, fisting his orange parka.

"it's ok," i whisper back, but it's not. it's really not. and we both know it.