It's Season Five of LITG, and you're the Main Character - until your ex shows up. In this version of events, MC is sweet, stable but fed up with BS. A fun, quick read for those who have been disappointed with S5.
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You start to wake up, brushing at your eyes. For a second, you're startled; it feels like waking up in a hotel, unfamiliar but oddly comfortable.
You sit up in bed. In the distance, you hear someone shouting from the pool and the sounds of people cooking in the kitchen.
Beside you, Suresh is sleeping peacefully with a pillow over his face. Another is wrapped around his head, like a set of earmuffs.
You laugh, and gently shake him awake.
"Sleeping beauty," you call out. "We're missing another day in parrrrradiseeeeee!"
Suresh groans and doesn't move.
Alfie, Kat, Dana, Eddie and Finn walk over, each carrying a plate. Dana bounds over and hands you your own. Your wrists nearly buckle under the weight of a classic fry up. It looks greasy, awful and gorgeous.
"Missed us?" you laugh.
Dana glances at you knowingly, and makes a great show of yawning. She hops off of her bed and skips back into Eddie's arms. She snuggles into him, and he rests his chin on her shoulder.
You roll your eyes and look away.
If she's trying to make me jealous, she's doing an awful job, you think to yourself.
"You're the one who really missed out on a good time," says Kat boldly. She weaves her fingers through Alfie's and beams at him.
Alfie busies himself with sipping coffee with his one free hand.
"Alfie's very good with his hands," Kat adds.
"God. Ew!" Eddie snaps. "Some things we just don't have to talk about!"
You can't help yourself. The utter look of horror on Eddie's face unravels you. You laugh loudly – so loudly that Suresh groans again and begins to move.
"I'm impressed, Alfie," says Finn, smirking. "I didn't think you could keep up with Kat."
Alfie guffaws.
"Just kidding, Alfie, mate," Finn grins, wiggling his eyebrows. Alfie smiles back, but it seems strained. Kat seems oblivious as she reapplies lip gloss.
"You can admit that you're jealous, mate," Alfie smirks back. "You're sleeping alone, after all."
"For now," Finn laughs. "Just wait."
Kat extracts herself from Alfie. To your surprise, she moves to sit beside you. She tosses a pillow against Alfie, and he catches it.
"Alright, boys," she says. "Girl time. Go clean the kitchen."
Dana extracts herself from Eddie, limb by limb, and joins you and Kat on the daybeds. You hear Suresh groan again beneath the blankets.
Without much of a hassle, much to your chagrin, Alfie, Finn, and Eddie move to clean the kitchen. Suresh starts to snore.
