I'm sorry

16. Monday

💭By Dreamer💭

3rd person POV.

Dear diary, I did something horrible this morning. I'm sure if anyone would know what i did, They would think i'm disgusting. I can still feel it on my wrists, and not just my wrists but also all over both my arms. If my mother wasn't disappointed in me already then she would surely be now. The worst part is that i couldn't stop, i kept going. An other one and an other one until my arms where full with them. It just felt so good. It was the only real thing i had ever in control.

i'm so sorry mom.

Izuku was doing his best to write as fast as he could. Class was about to start and he was going to be late. But he just had to write, it helpt him to get things off of his shoulders a bit. Even if it only helpt a little. He has been crying this whole morning, looking at his wrists seeing the red lines cover his skin was something that brought the tears back into his eyes.

When he was done writing, he got up and ran as fast as possible out the dorms heading to class. Feeling a little light headed because of blood lose and the lack of sleep Izuku slowed down. He was thinking that it would be better being late then to faint before even getting there.

When he arrived in front of the door that leads to his classroom he was 15 minutes late. Could have been worse right?

Let the day actually begin.

from the moment Izuku opened the door he got  scolded by his homeroom teacher for being late. With other students he would have yelled but Izuku is kind of his favorite. "Midoriya, why are you late?" "I'm sorry, i overslept." Izuku apologized while bowing. "Okay, you can go to your seat." Izuku went to sit on his seat and Aizawa went back to teaching. Mr. Aizawa always felt that there was something up with Izuku, something no child should have to go through. But he can't help Izuku when he dasn't know his situation.

an hour before lunch Izuku fell asleep during class, he was just so tired he couldn't keep his eyes open. Aizawa saw this but didn't act on it. He understands what it is to not have enough sleep. But where there is sleep there are also nightmares. Izuku started to scream in class and when he woke up he saw everyone looking at him. Right before Mr. Aizawa could say something there was a knock on the door. "Come in." Aizawa said as the door went open. "Hello, i'm here for Izuku, could i have him for a moment please?" It was Izuku's therapist. "Of course." Aizawa sighed as his eyes follow Izuku to the door until it closes.

The walk to the private room was very quiet. The both of them didn't mind, it was a comfortable silents. When they entered the room and once sat down only then Komi started to speak. "so Izuku, How have you been this weekend?" Izuku stayed silent, The memories of these cursed days flooded his head. What did happen this weekend? Mom dead, moved room, only had an hour sleep or so. 

"Did you try one of the few things i said would help? Like writing it down? Talking to a pet could also help." Komi said and waited patiently for a respond. "Y-yeah i did try writing it down." Izuku answered. "And, did it help a bit?" Komi asked. Izuku sighed and looked out the window blinking his tears away. "y-yeah it-it did h-.. h-help." Izuku suddenly had a hard time breathing. "I see your having trouble mentioning it. The things you wrote down must have been a huge weight on your shoulders. Can i ask you something Izuku?" The greenette nodded. "are you sometimes with people you know can and will help you if they knew about your situation, But you are to afraid to tell them or you don't know how?" Komi questioned and Izuku looked up. 

"There are multiple ways to ask for help, Izuku. Not just talking. You can write it down on a note and give it to them, or....." Just like that the therapy session went on and when it ended it was time for lunch, the time where everyone ate except Izuku.

After lunch, the class had training with all might. They needed to run around the perimeter. Izuku who was already exhausted and hadn't eaten in a while had trouble keeping up. His friend Uraraka noticed this. "Hey Deku-kun, Are you okay? you don't look so well." She asked while running next to him. "Y-yeah.... I'm.... fine-" Izuku said right before he fainted. "DEKU!"

Then it all went black.