To Hell and Back Again

Chapter Thirty-Nine

Eddie stood in the mirror, adjusting his belt to be tighter around his waist. He turned to look at his back then to his chest. He lifted his arm, looking at the side of his body. Eddie straightened out his back as he criticized his height and body. He didn't like his height. He was shorter than most guys, he was shorter than Steve. He had to stand on his toes to kiss his boyfriend for gods sake. He didn't like how thin his waist was compared to his rib cage. His body was too thin, too scrawny. He glanced at his waist line in the mirror. "Steve!" Eddie yelled as he put on his shirt. Steve ran into the bathroom, slightly out of breath. "Did you run?" Eddie looked at Steve through the mirror.
"Yes? Why did you yell? Are you okay?" Steve asked as Eddie turned to him. He struggled to catch his breath.
"Yeah, I'm fine." Eddie lifted up his shirt, revealing his waist. "Would a tattoo look good like right here?" Eddie circled his hand around a spot on his waist. Steve rolled his eyes.
"Yes. Do you need anything else?" Steve questioned as he watched Eddie lower his shirt back down. Eddie shook his head and turned back to the mirror. Steve sighed and walked back out of the bathroom. Eddie straightened out his hellfire shirt and followed Steve out of the room.
"Hey!" Eddie stopped Steve in his tracks. "So Gareth and Jeff don't really know about us." Eddie stuffed his hands into his pockets.
"Okay. That's fine." Steve smiled and turned to walk down the stairs.
"Y-yeah but if you're gonna go..." Eddie removed his hand from his pocket and grabbed Steve's arm to stop him from walking down the stairs. "Could you kinda play it off as if you're there for the kids?"
"Yeah, that's fine." Steve repeated. He walked down the stairs, his keys jingling in his hand. He opened the front door and glanced over to Eddie. "You ready to go?" He wasn't expecting Steve to be so cool with him not wanting his friends to know.
"Yeah." Eddie ran down the stairs, his backpack over his shoulder. "You know this is the first time I've seen them since the whole being dead thing." Eddie walked to Steve's car. Steve glanced over.
"Yes, Ed. You're freaking out about seeing them again. I know." Steve smiled and got into the car. He leaned across the passenger side seat and opened Eddie's door. Eddie got in and huffed.
Eddie sat down at the table in Gareth's garage as he set up the dungeon. Gareth walked into the garage, setting down a case of beer for him, Eddie, and Jeff. He looked over to Eddie as he focused on the dungeon set up. "So how have you been..." he broke the silence, making Eddie look up.
"I've been alright. It's been a little hard but it's been fine." Eddie opened up a binder full of pages of his writing. He glanced back up to Gareth. "How have you been?"
"I've been fine." Gareth answered. He watched as Eddie flipped through the pages. He was a tad hurt that Eddie didn't bother to reach out before now. He's been gone for almost two years and just now decided to speak to them again. There was a soft knock on the garage door. Gareth walked over to the garage door to open it. Erica and Dustin stood on the other side of the door. Dustin was wearing his Hellfire shirt from the last game they had played, a bit small from the time that had passed. Erica has the American flag secured to her back. "Hey!" Gareth patted Dustin's back as they walked into the garage.
"I heard it's gonna be a sick campaign, Eddie." Dustin said as he took his spot at the table.
"I don't know. The last one was kinda trash." Erica snarled as she looked over to Eddie. Eddie made a sour face in response.
"Hey, Henderson, did Steve bring you here?" Eddie asked Dustin. He raised his eyebrows trying to give Dustin the hint. Dustin started to shake his head then realized what the look on Eddie's face meant.
"Ohhh! Yeah! He's outside!" Dustin cleared his throat and stood from his seat. He walked out of the garage and waved Steve on from the driveway.
"Harrington?" Gareth made a weird face towards Eddie.
"Well Freak couldn't make it so I figured Harrington could fill in." Eddie laid out pieces of cardboard painted to look like dungeon flooring. Gareth kept a confused face as Steve approached the garage. Steve stood awkwardly in the doorway to the garage. Jeff walked up behind him, staring him down as he walked into the garage and took a seat at the table.
"What's Harrington doing here?" Jeff whispered to Gareth, being a big too loud. Steve pushed his eyebrows together at the comment. Dustin glared over towards Steve, noticing the silence in the room.
"Take your seats!" Eddie yelled as he banged his fist down on the table. Everyone took their seats, Steve sat between Dustin and Erica.
"Ed, I don't know how to play." Steve whispered over towards Eddie. Eddie looked over to Gareth and Jeff. They definitely had heard Steve call him Ed.
"Silence!" Eddie kept himself in character. "Our journey starts in the city of Brahn. A small community built on death and decay..." Eddie laid out the story, his eyes wide as he explained the story. Steve was lost. He had played DnD one time a long time ago with Erica. He didn't even remember how the dice rolling worked or anything. Steve sat quietly as he watched the other lean over the table and yell at each other about different plans of attack.
"Steve! Roll!" Dustin handed the D-20 to Steve. He looked around confused. He rolled the D-20. "Okay, maybe next time, Steve." Steve looked over to Dustin confused.
"What?" He asked as he leaned forward. Eddie continued the script he had written. He kept himself in character, yelling towards Gareth about a team of undead zombies.
"You're dead." Dustin smiled and patted Steve's back. Steve sighed and slumped back into his chair.
After the campaign had ended, it had been at least four hours of Steve sitting in his chair, dead of course. Eddie stood from his chair and leaned forward to shake Gareth's hand. "Good campaign, Eddie." Gareth said as Jeff nodded in agreement. The kids stood up from the table and collected their belongings.
"Is that it? It's over?" Steve looked around confused. Eddie nodded as he held his gaze on Steve. Everyone made their way out of the garage. Eddie stayed behind to talk to Gareth and Jeff.
"Wow, great campaign." Jeff put his hands in his pockets as he talked to Eddie. Gareth nodded in agreement. "Harrington kinda dragged us down though..." Eddie shrugged.
"Yeah, well he was here and we were down a person so-"
"Since when have you guys been friends?" Jeff crossed his arms and leaned against the wall of the garage. He looked at Eddie's hands as he cleaned up the setup, noticing the heart tattoo on Eddie's wrist.
"Oh, we're not." Eddie smiled and rocked on his heels. Technically, it wasn't a lie. Jeff nodded, slightly unconvinced. "Well, I should get going. I'll see you guys later!" Eddie smiled and squeezed Gareth's shoulder as he turned to walk out of the garage. Eddie walked down the driveway, his backpack in his hand. Gareth and Jeff walked out of the garage, watching Eddie get into the passenger side of Steve's car.
"Oh. They're not friends." Jeff said as he turned to Gareth. Gareth held a straight face.
"I got it." Gareth smiled as he walked down the driveway towards Steve's car. He knocked on the window on Eddie's side. Eddie rolled down the window, a awkward smile on his face. "Hey, Ed." Gareth looked Steve up and down. "Harrington." He looked back to the back seat. "Lady Applejack, Henderson." Erica and Dustin sat awkwardly in the backseat waiting for what Gareth was going to say about the two in front of them.
"Hey Gareth..." Eddie said quietly.
"You forgot one of your pieces." Gareth reached into his pocket and pulled out a small zombie figurine. "Um... yeah so it was nice to see you." Eddie smiled at Gareth's comment.
"Yeah, it was nice to see you guys too." Eddie put his arm on the edge of the window. Steve sat awkwardly in the drivers seat as Erica and Dustin chatted in the backseat. "I'll make sure to keep in touch with you guys."
"Yeah, for sure." Gareth patted the side of the car as he backed away a bit. "See you guys later." Gareth waved to Dustin and Erica, ignoring Steve's presence. Steve put the car in drive, ready to leave. He lowered his foot on the gas, rolling away from Gareth's house. Eddie took his arm off the window and started to roll it up.
"I don't think they like me." Steve gripped the wheel. He glanced over to Eddie, who was sitting quietly, staring out the window. Steve looked back to the road and cleared his throat.
"It's probably because you don't know how to play the game." Dustin crossed his arms as he roasted Steve subtly. Steve shot him a dirty look.
"Yeah, Steve. That was kinda weak." Erica smirked. Steve hit the breaks harshly at a stop sign.
"Both of you shut up!" Steve yelled to the back seat. He put down the sun visor to block the sun from his eyes. He glanced over to Eddie as he turned the corner. "I didn't know I was going to play."
"I didn't know that you were going to suck so bad." Eddie responded. Steve furrowed his eyebrows and looked back to the road.
"Well, I don't know how to play. You know that." Steve gripped the steering wheel, his eyes focused on the road, resisting the urge to look over at Eddie. Dustin looked to the picture of Eddie sitting in the passenger seat that was stuck in Steve's sun visor. He raised his eyebrows in response.
"What's your deal?" Eddie turned his head towards Steve. He continued to watch the road instead of looking at Eddie. "Are you mad I didn't tell Gareth and Jeff?"
"No! I'm not mad!" Steve shifted his shoulders around. He parked in front of Dustin's house. "Erica, you're going to wait here for Lucas right?" Steve turned around to face the kids.
"Yep. Don't kill each other." She responded as she got out of the car. She closed the door and walked up to the house. Dustin leaned in between the seats.
"You did great today, Steve." Dustin patted his shoulder then got out of the car to follow Erica. Steve waited for the kids to get into the house then drove away.
"I think you're mad." Eddie crossed his arms.
"I'm not mad." Steve was definitely mad. He didn't know he was going to be pulled into a game. If he did, then he would have learned how to play before hand. The least he wanted was a heads up. He tapped the steering wheel harshly with his fingers. He pulled into his driveway and put the car into park. He put up his sun visor then got out of the car, making his way up to the house. His eyes stayed forward as he unlocked his front door and went in. Eddie followed him in a couple seconds after him.
"I think you're mad. Can you just tell me why?" Eddie followed Steve into the kitchen, watching him put down his car keys on the counter. He leaned against the counter, his eyes piercing into Eddie's.
"I didn't know I was going to have to play. You made me look like an idiot in front of your friends and the kids." Steve tapped his fingers on the counter, his other hand pushed into his pocket. Eddie gawked at his comment.
"Are you kidding me?" Eddie crossed his arms and laughed. "Who cares? Nobody is judging you because you died on the first fight."
"You are. Right now. You're judging me." Steve took his hand out of his pocket and threw it into the air. "I thought I was just going to cheer you guys on or something. A heads up would have been nice."
"I did give you a heads up. I said 'hey, babe, do you want to come to my campaign and fill in for Freak?" Eddie leaned against the counter. He looked Steve up and down. "Y-you agreed to that."
"I didn't agree to playing. I didn't know Freak played." Steve got closer to Eddie. He furrowed his eyebrows and gripped the edge of the counter.
"You did agree. You said 'sure, Ed.' OH! And you called me Ed in front of my friends after I told them we weren't friends. You made me look like an idiot." Eddie pushed back his hair as he let out a laugh.
"You told them we weren't friends?" Steve's knuckles went white from gripping the counter. Eddie glanced down at his hand. "W-why couldn't we even be friends?"
"Because you were a douche when they saw you last. You've always been an asshole." Eddie put his hands in the air. He started to feel hotter, like he was boiling. Steve scoffed.
"Yes, I'm an asshole. An asshole that let you sleep in my bed when you were too scared to be alone and I didn't even know you very well." Steve took his hand off the counter, balling up his fist instead. Eddie widened his eyes. He bit his lip, knowing he couldn't say anything because Steve was right.
"You guys left me in th-that place to die. When I got back I felt like I was going to die. You're the one who offered to bring me home." Eddie squinted his eyes as he bit the inside of his cheek.
"We didn't leave you to die! We thought you were dead!" Steve threw his hand into the air, causing Eddie to tighten his fists.
"You- you know what?" Eddie turned to Steve and got closer.
"What? What are you going to say, Eddie?" Steve looked Eddie up and down, noticing how angry he was. There was no real reason for either of them to be too angry at each other, something just kept them going. Every single thing they had wanted to say to each other started to come up.
"You can go fuck yourself." Eddie stepped closer to Steve, poking him in the chest harshly. Steve clenched his jaw as he looked down at Eddie's hand.
"What did you say?" Steve leaned towards Eddie.
"You have been so fucking distant recently. You barely talk to me anymore. We live in the same house and I barely fucking talk to you!" Eddie raised his voice. He and Steve held eye contact for a moment. Eddie took a step back while his eyes continued to hold on Steve's.
"I have been distant because you have been different!" Steve tried to refrain himself from saying something else. He couldn't hold it back. There was something happening between them but neither of them knew what it was.
"I've been different?" Eddie asked, his heart dropping into his stomach.
"You've been different." Steve repeated. Eddie bit his lip and looked away. He pushed his hair out of his face while he searched for something to say. "You have this new mindset where you have to be superior. You have to act like fucking God anytime there's a conflict. There was an intruder in my house and you were ready to kill them. Old Eddie wouldn't have ever done that."
"Old Eddie?" He asked Steve, his voice soft and shaky. Steve looked away from him. He put his hand over his mouth in frustration. "I'm sorry Steve. I'm sorry I've changed. I'm so fucking sorry that I've moved on from this fucked up shit that has been emotionally crippling me for the last year!" Eddie raised his voice, startling Steve.
"We all moved on Ed! You're the only one who hadn't!" Steve yelled back, his volume meeting Eddie's. Eddie shook his head.
"Our entire relationship is built on me coming back home with you after that!" Eddie threw his hands into the air.
"And I'm so glad you did because you're the best fucking thing that's ever happened to me!" Steve screamed back, his voice breaking.
"That's bullshit, Steve!" Eddie yelled towards him. He stood slightly shaken by Eddie's words. All he could think about was that night at the party with Nancy.
"Yes, Eddie! Everything I say is bullshit! Every single thing!" Steve yelled as he threw his hands into the air. "Because God forbid I love you and you accept that!"
"I love you too but I'm so pissed off right now!" Eddie slammed his fist down on the counter. Steve put his hand over his face.
"We're arguing over a game!" Steve screamed towards Eddie. He stood for a moment then bit the edge of his lip.
"It's so hot when you yell at me!" Eddie yelled back as he grabbed a towel off the counter and threw it on the ground. Steve shook his head confused. "I didn't want to throw something breakable!" Their argument had stopped. Now they were just yelling at each other for the hell of it. Steve raised his eyebrows and nodded. He grabbed a mug off the counter and threw it against the wall. The two watched as the mug shattered and fell to the ground in pieces.
"Well I did!" Steve yelled back at Eddie.
"That was my mug!" Eddie gestures towards the shattered ceramic.
"I'll buy you a new one!" Steve yelled back. Eddie bust into laughter and Steve shortly followed. "What are we doing?"
"I don't know." Eddie continued to laugh.