BE ON CLOUD UNIVERSE [END]

DANCING IN THE RAIN - PETERNODT

NODT POV

After a long time of processing his information with the court, Nodt finally reinvented his identity. It only took the majority of the months the year was kind enough to give him.

As he stared at the name in the document that had just arrived that morning, his mind was at ease. No longer was he weighed down by the crushing weight of the past.

He thought about the relationships in his life. Nodt had a wonderful fiancé, Peter and a few friends that had been there for his through this journey.

Of course, it's hard to think of the present without acknowledging the past. A fleeting thought was enough to cause a twinge of pain to his heart.

For the sake of his life, 'Big' had to leave permanently. Simply cutting out the ones causing him the most pain was not enough since the rest of the people in his life were too connected to them.

(Big was his old name, before he change his name to Nodt. While being Big, he had a bad past. So that makes him depressed. After free from his past, he meets Peter and changes his name to Nodt.)

He knew that if he attempted to spend time with the others as they'd attempt to try to trick him into meeting with the people he feared the most. There was never any physical threat.

However, the damage to the psyche that those people would cause would be irreparable more than it already was.

He sat for a long time on that old porch. Nodt and Peter had just save enough money to buy a small classic home at Chiang Mai.

It was dirty. The paint on the wood was fading so that it was a muted red with sunspots in some areas and water stains in others. The house was slightly run-down though they made it work.

Peter volunteered to renovate their homes. He had some experience in the maintenance necessary to keep the place from falling apart.

They had a good-sized yard, though surrounded by corn on three sides, while he appreciated the privacy, he did miss the neighborly feeling that his previous city had brought.

It was slightly windy that day, and the sun was peaking through some darkening clouds. A warm day with a breeze was his favorite weather type.

The few trees in their yard swayed, making a calming noise in harmony with the wind while old music playing from the speaker through the open window. He could smell the rain was coming from the mixture created by the air and the road nearby.

He focused on his breathing as he stared at that name. He had it picked out for a long time. It felt like him, it felt like home.

He sat imagining what his loved one's life would have been like if he had followed his plan all those months ago.

What it would be if he were not sitting on this porch looking through his mail.

He once thought about death and what it could mean. He had always been curious and sometimes close to it.

It had always brought him a sense of comfort. Having been raised religious, but no longer, death seemed as a grand adventure.

With nothing certain, there's only one way to find out the answer to this ultimate question. He had always been curious to know the answer.

But looking up from his mail at the trees and hearing the sound nature, he knew in his heart that there were still things in this world joyous enough to keep him from searching too far.

His life was more uncertain than the answer following the inevitable. Although soon to be married, children were not in the plans.

Given what he had been through, he did not want to raise children. In his heart, he would not be able to love them fully. The people in his past and the subsequent traumas that he had experienced prevented it.

But he was capable of love. The love he felt for Peter was like one he had never experienced. He was proud to imagine himself at the alter with him.

Along with this he was falling in love with the little things more and more each day, and he realized this as he listened to the soft howling of the wind as the darker clouds came rolling in. Looking back at this new name, he knew he could come to love himself again.

Many hours passed as he mulled over the differences between life and death, the past and the present. Not once did he leave his spot on the old porch.

The future did not cross his mind much unless it was to do with the wedding. He hadn't really planned much beyond that.

Nodt had a job but didn't know if it truly made him happy, so he was toying with the idea of starting a business from his home, possibly by making jewelry or writing or maybe bake some biscuit and cake.

He smiled as his thoughts shifted to his wedding and to his lover. They had fallen in love at a young age. Everyone's disbelief at first, and now they have proven their love as they continue to support each other through their ups and downs life.

He was so caught up in his thoughts that he had barely noticed his lover pulling into their short driveway, walking up to the porch to sit next to him.

By then, the weather had shifted as the clouds started to sprinkle. The smell of the rain much stronger bringing a sense of ease to wash away all anxieties of the day.

"You okay?" Peter asked as they sat and started rubbing their knee.

They had dropped a box of books onto it during the move two weeks prior. It was still bothering them at times, though they couldn't find the time to see a doctor as they didn't think it was that serious anyways.

He didn't say anything. Instead, he lifted the document up to show Peter what had arrived that day, looking up at a bird that had started to chirp.

After a quick examination there was a sigh of relief. It was a marker that both of their stressful days worrying about the past were truly over. They could finally move on.

(Nodt received a letter from hospital, saying that he is now free from despression and anxiety)

Nodt looked back at Peter with a smile, kissed them, and took them by the hand. As he looked over at them, the last of his worries slipped away and were replaced by feelings of love and belonging as he realized how truly in love he was.

"We should to go inside before the rain gets stronger, i guess?" Peter asked as they slowly stood. There was no covering on the porch, both of their clothing became increasingly damp.

Nodt leaned back and arched his head to look towards the speaker in the still open window, droplets splattering into the windowsill and sliding towards the sink below. It would cause stains, but compared to the rest of the house would hardly make a difference.

While most would look at the place disgusted, he loved its character. It felt like it had a history he could now be a part of. Like him, it had a chance for a new beginning.

Nodt looked back to his loving fiancé and slowly stood, a mischievous grin growing on his face.

After sitting for many hours, his pent up energy was finally ready to spill. He let his thoughts drift away as he returned to his usual playfulness and suddenly took Peter by the hand, dragging him off the porch.

With his new sense of freedom he couldn't think of anything more joyous than dancing to the old tunes playing from the speaker in the window, just out of reach of the rain.

He threw his arms up and spun around. He splashed in puddles. All while trying to get Peter to join him as he danced in the rain.

He finally knew what it felt like to be one of those boys in the movies, who so overcome with emotion, frolic in the downpour, enjoying the feeling of the droplets falling on their face.

Peter just shook his head and laughed at his expressions of joy, reminded of the reason they had fallen in love with him in the first place.

- THE END -