What you mean to me

chapter three

Bailey woke up late the next morning. She brushed her teeth and headed down stairs, her head spinning.

She didn't sleep properly. Nightmares

She took a bottle of aspirin from a cupboard in the kitchen and took a few doses. She moved on to reheat the pasta from last night, after which she served herself and her mom.

She carried her mom's food in a tray up to her room.

" Mom? " Bailey called opening the door.

The sight she saw made her headache return with nausea.
Her mum's room was littered with packs of cigarettes, alcohol bottles and her boxes were still unpacked and in disarray.

Bailey dropped the tray of food on a manageably clear area on the dresser and went to find her mum.

She found her in the toilet. She tried to open the door but it was locked.

" Mum! " screamed Bailey. Her voice faltered. The tears stung her eyes but she had to hold them in. She had to be strong. " Mum please come out. I made breakfast. "

No reply.

Few minutes later Griselda, her mum came out.
Bailey was a real carbon copy of her mother, maybe that's why she's close to her. Griselda stared at her daughter with sunken heavy eyes. She had huge bags and her face had tons of wrinkles that Bailey could not recognize her own mother.

It has always been like this. If not for the genetic resemblance, Bailey would have left it as she had no mother.

" Baby, " Griselda said in a broken voice. " I'm sorry. I couldn't help it. I saw him, your father. I saw my husband, my love. I wanted to hold him, hug him. At least, touch him. But then.....he vanished. " she spoke delusional. " He always vanishes. " she began to sob. She reached out for Bailey for support but the latter stepped back.
Griselda stumbled but Bailey was quick to catch her fall and brought her to her feet.

Bailey was angry, sick and all drama made her want to cry. No! she wanted to punch; punch the madness in her mother away, punch it to a pulp then drag it to hell and continue to beat it up till her fist breaks and her knuckles burn.

She missed her mother.

But she gathered herself and put on a stoic expression. And with a calm gesture she led her still sobbing mum her bed.
She brought the food and put it near her. " You have to eat. " she began to feed her.

" I love you Baby. " her mother said in a shaky voice. " Never leave me. Don't. you. never.... Leave me. ". Swallow. " If you do I will never forgive you. ". Griselda stared at her daughter with teary eyes and a pleading but firm look.
She cupped her cheek with a rough, leather-feeling palm.

Bailey stared back at with the same expression. She placed her own smooth but not that soft palm over her mother's.
" I can only promise that if you cut this out. Forget the past, stop taking weed and other shit. Look on the bright side of things. And let's live normal as mother and daughter. And I'll never leave you, else, I'll leave. "

Griselda knew her daughter wasn't kidding. She never does. Independent and secure. That's why she's proud of her. And she loves her.

She looked away from her gaze. " I'll try. "

Bailey managed a small smile but she hid it. " And I'll help. I have school so I'll hire a nurse. Are you okay with that? "

" If it means you stay, and don't leave....I'll manage. "

Bailey nodded. It wasn't the reply she was expecting but It'll do.
" Eat up, clear this place up and have some rest. I'll be back in the evening. Love ya. " she said and left.

Bailey headed to her room and started the search mission for a new nurse for her mum.
When she found one, it didn't get her hopes high because she refused when she sent her last name.
Bitch! Bailey mentally cussed.
She continued her search.

It has always been like this. She'd even taken her mother to a hospital. And there weeks later they called her uncle; Amber's father, to come take her back saying she stabbed her therapist because her mother thought she thought she took away her husband.
Ever since then, her mother became her priority, patient and burden.

*

Bailey couldn't find a nurse so she decided to leave it to tomorrow. She went on to check her registration with Builders High.
She beamed in joy when she saw the message. She was accepted.

But that wasn't the cause of her joy. She met up with the school's principal weeks ago.
She'd written the entrance exam long before but the vice principal didn't who was in seat when she came to apply. He rejected her at first glance at her moral records from her former schools. And concluded she was a rebel thereby didn't accept her.
So then she left the shitty, smelly man's office, hustled her way to the principal himself. She had goals to accomplish and she needed a highschool certificate to do that.
She and the principal talked. He saw reason; he also has a daughter of same character as Bailey but in a boarding school. Moreso her, Bailey's, grades looked very outstanding and she had good communication skills and he was impressed.

That's the story.

In addition, She just likes to hear good news.

**

After work, she took a Scrabble game to her mom's room for both of them to play.

Her smile increased when she saw her mother's room very arranged and neat.
Griselda looked good too in a flowery yellow dress that Bailey's father gave her on her thirty-fifth birthday, and her hair was in a neat pony.

Bailey gayly jumped on the bed next to her mum. " Up for a game of Scrabble? " she said.

" Always. " Griselda responded her voice still dull. But she was trying,wasn't she?

Bailey stared at her mum with affection. Yes she was.

But deep down, Bailey knew this wasn't going to last. It always happens. But she prayed that this was just one of those miracle moments, that her mum is truly trying to be normal and it turned out permanent.

But enjoy every happy moment to the last right? And that's what she Bailey Everstone did, does and will do.

She laughed at her mum when she thought ' dipshit ' was a real word and she laughed harder when her mom claimed to have heard it from her.

They cracked jokes, chatted till night but none fell asleep. They both had the same experience and are both afraid of the nightmares that haunt them in the night.

But surprisingly, Griselda spoke up. " You should try and get some sleep Baby. You have school tomorrow, don't you? "

" Sure. " Bailey began packing up the game. She stared at her mum. " Try and rest yourself. I can't find a nurse at the moment but I'll keep trying. I'll be out early tomorrow, so please remember our promise. ".

" Yeah. I'll try my best. "

" Love you. Sleep tight. " Bailey said but they both knew it was impossible.

But what could they do? They can't fight the unreal, even though they try.

*

Bailey went to her room and was glad the night light was on. She immediately took a shower and put on her nightie then waited for the sleep.
At least, the night light's on, so they'll be no monsters.

Brandon, her brother, isn't around to scare her anymore.
She had to be strong. I'm tough!.

My past doesn't control me. They are gone and they died in the past. No monsters! No, they aren't real! She chanted in her head to sleep. Her lullaby.