Saving Her

Chapter 4: You Lied

Audriella's POV:

It's as though time is frozen. I stand staring at him, eyes wide. He stares back at me. I looked at his face, stubble poking out of his skin. My eyes travel down his face, along his jaw to his neck, tattoos poking up through the collar of his leather jacket. Down; his shoulders are broad; he looks strong.

My eyes followed down his arms, seeing his hand firmly on the doorknob. His knuckles are white like he's holding on for dear life; as if that door handle is the only thing keeping him grounded. His chest rises and falls slowly, breath after breath, keeping his composure locked.

He looks casual; like he is out meeting friends, not in a business meeting with my father. What is he doing here? Why is he back? And with my father. How well do they actually know each other? Why does it seem like this isn't the first time that he's been back?

My eyes flowed back up to his to see he is still staring at me. Unsure of what to do, I glance behind him at my parents. My father seems worried, glancing between the two of us, but has a small smile on his face, like this was something that he couldn't wait to happen. My mother looks unimpressed, upset, almost angry even. When I look back at Zayn he still hasn't moved. Before I know it; I'm speaking:

"What are you doing here? When did you come back? Why did you leave? Why didn't you say goodbye? Why have you not called? Why didn't I know you were coming back?" A million questions run through my head as I begin spouting them all, trying to get every last word out, afraid that he may disappear again.

Unable to make a sound. He just stares at me. His jaw is clenched, his eyes dark, an unreadable expression on his face.

"Why don't you two go talk? I am sure you have much to catch up on." Pa says, looking relieved.

"That's not a good idea, Mattio." My mother spoke, stepping to his side

"Maybe, but they should still talk, Elena. It's been years." He responded, looking at me.

I waste no time grabbing Zayn's wrist and pulling him behind me through the hallway, down the stairs, and out the door into the field. He follows behind me mindlessly. I drag him all the way to the big oak tree at the side of the house before standing in front of him again.

I sit in the grass, looking up at Zayn motioning for him to sit, which he does. He sits far enough away that we aren't touching but if I were to reach out I could touch his legs. He sits, eyes guarded, as though he were being cautious of me.

"Where did you go, Zayn?" I nearly whisper, afraid if I spoke any louder my voice might break. "Why didn't you say goodbye? Why didn't you tell me you were leaving? We sat out here for hours, you didn't say anything. You promised you'd see me again, you said you'd come to my birthday. You promised you'd be back. You lied. Everyone lied." I spoke bitterly.

He stared at me for a while longer before finally opening his mouth. "My father was sick, Ella. I had to take care of him. He had cancer. He had had it for years, it was just getting worse. He left me his entire business. I wrote you letters, every day for four years. I told you all of this, I told you why I had to leave. I told you about everything I was allowed to. You never responded." He spoke softly, refusing to meet my eyes. "I figured you were just upset that I didn't say bye to your face. Any time I called your mother or Maycie answered. They always said you were busy, or you didn't want to talk."

"I never got any letters?" I question "I woke up one day and you were gone, Zayn, you didn't call, you didn't write, you didn't come back. I honestly thought you just left. You and Leone both seemingly dropped off the face of the earth." I spoke, breaking piece by piece as I relive the feeling of him leaving. Not even able to tell him that Leo never disappeared, because he was supposed to.

I'm holding back tears, biting my lip when I feel Zayn's hand on my chin forcing me to look at him.

"I would have never just left you, Audrey. You were my best friend. How could you think that I'd just leave? I did write, I told you why I left. I was In shock after my father died. It took me a while to write the letter, but I wrote it. I gave it to Leo and he was supposed to give it to you at your birthday party. He told me Maycie was there and she took the letter to give to you. I thought you hated me, you never responded to my letters, I don't know why you didn't get them, your mother told me to stop writing to you, she said you hated me, that I broke your ten-year-old heart. So I stopped writing them. I just focused on running my father's business, instead."

"My mother? You're sure? Why would she do that? She was there for me when you left. She told me she didn't know where you were, but that you could have seen me if you wanted to. She said you didn't want to. Everyone else told me you had to leave to take care of your father's business, but he said you'd be back. I thought you would come back. He was wrong, I was wrong." I spoke, wiping a stray tear away. Zayn grabbed my wrist and held it in his hand.

"Anytime I called the house phone Maycie would answer and say you were busy. So I put everything down on paper. But Elena told me to stop. She said my letters were just causing you more pain. She said she was watching you fall apart. I didn't want to do that to you, so I stopped. I thought you were the one who didn't want to see or talk to me." He spoke rubbing circles on the back of my wrist. " I had to leave, my father needed me. His business.....it needed me, Ella." he continued

"I did it though. I took it over, completely. I had some help getting my footing from Carlisle, my father's second, who was filling in until I took over. He was an absolute fucking dickhead, and ruined my life, but I did it. I turned the business into an empire. Everything my father wanted but couldn't do. I did it. He'd be so proud to see where it is now. Leo helps me a lot, he's my best friend. He's my right hand in this whole thing, when I took over I was allowed to choose someone as my second. I chose him. Although I didn't really get to pick, my dad pretty much told me it was him or no one."

I paused, that meant Leo knew he never left, and he didn't tell me, he didn't tell me anything except that Zayn didn't want to be gone. I watched Zayn's thumb rub circles across my skin. Sparks flew everywhere he touched. I looked up to meet his eyes. God, I missed his eyes. I stared at him for a while, registering what he said.

"Do you remember our last conversation out here under this tree, Zee?" I ask. Biting my lip nervously.

"About your birthday party?" He asks, pausing

"No. About the soulmates?" I see him swallow and furrow his brows, and suddenly the weight on my chest is back.

He picks at some more grass before finally responding. "Oh, that conversation. Yeah, I remember it." He sighs like he's already regretting this.

"Do you still believe in soulmates?" I asked full of hope; I do. I believe in soulmates now more than ever. Even if it was eight years later. Zayn still came back. That has to mean something. This has to mean something.

Then I think about Leo. He never left. He's been around, maybe I haven't seen him in a while, but he was around. We've been keeping whatever this is friendly, but what if it wasn't anymore? What if Zayn was always supposed to leave, what if Leo was always supposed to stay? What if that was what destiny intended? What does that mean? What does any of this mean?

".....No. Not Really Ella. I mean, maybe there are people you're destined to meet, but I don't think destiny can tell you who you're going to be with." Zayn responds, looking at me. His eyes fogged over again, they're darker than I remember. They were always soft; like chocolate and honey. As though they were full of hopes and dreams. Now they are like a rabbit hole in the ground; as though I could fall in if I looked too close. Getting trapped in an inescapable maze of dark, hidden memories. They feel empty; guarded.

"Oh..." I respond sadly, feeling as though I were being run over by a truck. "Yeah you're probably right, it's a silly idea," I said begrudgingly.

"Yeah"