"he has persuasive lips but terrible motives."
a story about young people navigating love, friendship, drugs and becoming an adult.
content warnings: mature content and descriptions of drugs, suicide and overdose.
edited in dec 2022.
Isabella heard his voice behind her but she didn't stop walking. He was the last person she wanted to see. She wanted to get to bed and sleep, just forget about what she had found out. It wasn't like he had done anything wrong, he hadn't promised her anything. When they were standing in line to the rollercoaster she thought he felt something... that his lips longed for hers like hers did for his. Isa had picked up her pace but that didn't stop him from catching up to her. Fuckshit grabbed her arm and made her stop.
"What is going on isabella? What happened?" She turned and was forced to look at him. For a second she thought about telling him the truth but she knew that she would regret it when she sobered up.
"I told you, it's nothing. I just wanna go home." Now she avoided his gaze and looked down.
"You sure? You can tell me anything, you know that right?"
"I know."
It hadn't been long since school started and since she moved in with her father.Sstill she had told the boys more about herself than she had ever told her old friends. And Fuckshit knew most of them all. He knew about the messed up relationship she had with her parents and how her life had been before she moved to LA. He reached out and pulled her into a hug, suddenly she didn't feel so angry anymore.
"You want me to walk you home?"
"No, it's fine. I'll talk to you tomorrow." She said as she pulled away from him. A smile was present on her lips, trying to show him that she was okay and that he didn't need to worry about her.
"Okay... sleep tight shawty." Quickly she turned around and set off walking again. Fuckshit stood there for a moment, watching her until he eventually turned back to the carnival.
When she got home she didn't bother taking off her makeup or anything, just straight into bed. Sleeping like a baby throughout the night. The next morning she was woken up by her father yelling her name.
"Isabella! The phone, it's for you!" She groaned, feeling the headache as she opened her eyes. She had slept well but she could feel the liquor she had yesterday.
"Coming!" She threw on a hoodie and made her way downstairs. Her father was in front of the TV, watching the news. Isa moved into the kitchen and picked up the phone.
"Hello?"
"Hey." It was Ray. Suddenly yesterday's happenings came back to her, how she stormed off after speaking to him. It hadn't been his fault but at that moment she felt lied to.
"Hey... I'm sorry about yesterday." Isa sat down on one of the kitchen chairs, twirling the telephone cord between her fingers.
"I'm sorry too. I should've told you about what was going on and I.... didn't. I guess I just didn't want to see you hurt." She nodded to herself. Isa couldn't be mad at him, he did what he did to protect her.
"I get it... it's fine. Just... don't do it again? You know, tell me stuff."
"I will, I promise. So, we're cool?"
"Yeah, we're cool." A chuckle escaped her lips.
"So you coming to the shop?"
"Yeah, I guess. I need some pizza, this headache is fucking killing me." She replied with a low voice so her father wouldn't hear.
"I'll order. it's on me, see it as an apology gift. The boys are on their way right now too."
"Alright, I'll see you in 15." She put the phone back on the hook and made it out in the living room.
"Did you have fun yesterday?" Her father asked. The question caught her by surprise. He had never been the talkative type, especially not when it came to her life.
"Yeah, it was fine."
"I uh... I see doing well in school so far. Good job isa." She hadn't thought about it but she was going to school every day. She did her assignments in time, it wasn't like she was a top student or anything but she was doing well.
"Thanks."
"I spoke to your mother yesterday. I told you how good it's going for you here. I knew that having you here would do some good."
"Oh, so that's what it's about? You had something to brag about to mom? To show her how you're a better parent?" She replied annoyed, rolling her eyes.
"That's not..." Just because things had been fine between them, didn't mean that she would forget her fathers absence her whole life. It wasn't like she would start giving him the benefit of the doubt now. She moved past the couch and went up the stairs to her room.
Isa got out of yesterday's clothes and changed into a big t-shirt and a pair of jeans, she went through her drawer for another hoodie and stumbled upon a black one. She picked it up and realized it was Fuckshits. One night he had walked her home and it was freezing so he had offered it to her. Quickly she put it back and picked up another one and threw it on.
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Slowly she made her way to motors. The sun was shining and making her headache even worse. When she got to the shop all the boys were already sprawled out on the couch eating pizza.
"Yo save some for me." Isa said with a smile as she made her way over.
"Yeah, Fourthgrade save some for Isa!" Fuckshit joked, while stuffing his face with pepperoni pizza. Fourthgrade looked confused and she couldn't help but smile a little.
"I feel like I'm gonna puke." Ruben mumbled as he laid with his eyes closed. Isa and Ray laughed at him.
"I told you to slow down yesterday but you didn't listen." Ray replied, leaning back onto the couch.
"Come on, make some room." She said as she squeezed in between Stevie and Fourthgrade.
"Why did you leave yesterday?" Stevie asked, looking at her.
"Oh I... I got tired. That's all." She glanced up at Ray who smiled softly at her. She reached for a slice of pizza and then nudged stevie.
"Did you go on any more rides?" Stevie shined up.
"Yeah! We went on the ferris wheel and Fourthgrade filmed some cool shots from the top..."
Again everything was back to normal. Or was it really? She glanced over at Fuckshit and her heart jumped in her chest, he didn't seem to notice though.
