Rescue Me

Forty Six

"By orders of President Snow, all citizens must proceed to the Presidential estate."

I don't bother to look at the wanted posters as I walk through the empty streets of the capital. My mind felt blank, numb even. I didn't feel like I was walking to battle. It felt like I wasn't supposed to be here.

Or it felt like I was doing the wrong thing. Nothing about this felt good. I didn't trust Gale, not entirely anyway. I barely knew him. I barely knew any of these people for that matter, but still was forced to befriend them for the time being.

"...Additional food, water, and shelter will be donated to you if done accurately."

I'm seventeen years old. And I'm the new face of a rebellion, whether people realize it or not yet. How the hell did Katniss possibly do this? How the hell did she always know what to do?

I'm not a leader. I make mistakes, I don't put my faith in other people, and I certainly don't trust anyone easily. What do people possibly see in me that they don't see in Finnick?

"If we get caught," Gale's voice mumbles to me as we walk through an alleyway. I could see a bunch of people walking ahead, but they kept their heads forward. They were unable to see us. "Kill me."

"Why?" I ask, my tone equally as quiet as his.

"I don't want to be tortured in there," He explained. "You saw what Peeta and Cato had to go through. I can't bare to put myself through that."

I didn't want to go through that. But I didn't want to die either. I've fought too long and hard to only die by torture, or even Gale's bullet. I deserve a life where I'm at peace. I deserve a life away from all of this.

"We're not going to get caught," I told him. "We're going to get inside." I was rather optimistic about this, which really surprised me. Normally I would be full of doubt. But today, for some reason I had a feeling that Gale and I were going to get inside the mansion.

I catch my reflection in one of the windows, and my eyes run down my body. The hood concealed us well, but I find myself starting to worry about if we're hidden too well.

"If we do," He continued, "Do you want to be the one that takes the shot?"

I don't answer for a couple of seconds. I should be the one to take it, Katniss would be the one that wanted that. But I find myself not wanting to. Not because I was afraid of killing, that part of guilt in me is long gone. Especially when it comes to President Snow.

But because I was afraid of what came next.

What would happen after Snow dies? Who's going to take over? What's going to happen to our country that we were raised in? What's going to happen to me?

"I can't give you an answer right now," I told him. "I'll let you know."

"Okay, we'll radio to the others that we've successfully accomplished our mission," I appreciate that he doesn't ask any further questions. I think I've been poked and prodded enough at this point.

"Let's go," I tell him. We walk at a moderate pace, not rushed, not urgent, a slow but steady pace. We need to make it look like we're citizens, we need to blend in.

My shoulders collide with the person standing next to me, which causes me to look up. The normally clear path leading to the mansion was now congested. Hundreds of people were gathered here. We all looked so different, but we all blended in perfectly. Gale and I, blended in perfectly.

My fear fades as I discover more people wearing cloaks like ours. Since it was a cold day, wearing something this lengthy and heavy was normal. Maybe this isn't a shitty plan, maybe this will actually work.