Snow (Zarry AU)

Part 8

Some things are easier said than done, but sometimes words can't help you either. Zayn figures if he stares at the ceiling long enough, he'll know.

It's day seven, and Doniya has taken Harry off his hands for the time being. She understands his need to think and prepare himself, to come up with a plan. He isn't one to improvise.

Dinner the night before was difficult because Zayn had to keep reminding himself to keep his chin up, eyes ahead, and focus on his goal. He kept repeating the mantra so often in his head that he forgot to say more, so he barely said a word that night. He's a work in progress.

And progress is what he is making; he's almost sure Harry doesn't think he's an idiot. The rest still has to be confirmed, but he's working on it. If lying on his bed and staring at the ceiling could be considered working.

Zayn wishes he could let someone else do it, like when he was a kid and asked his friend if he wanted to tell this girl he liked her, in exchange for some sweets. Why didn't adults still do that? Sometimes Zayn really hates being a grown-up. There are definitely perks, but he still wishes things were easier.

He groans and turns on his side, because now his thoughts are getting off track. Instead of lying on his bed, he decides to spend some time on the balcony and grabs the warm, soft quilt. When he sets foot on the balcony, he wraps it around himself and sinks down to sit on the floor.

He watches the world through the bars and blinks at the brightness of everything. It always takes a while for his eyes to get used to, but once they are, there's a calm that settles over him. Looking at the snow-covered mountains, valleys and trees is like looking at a blank canvas. It reminds him of possibilities. The chance to start creating wherever you like, however and whenever.

Snow may be awfully cold and wet, but Zayn can't deny its beauty. His appreciation for snow is just another sign of how he's grown these past few days. When he first arrived here he was bitter. It felt like the world was out to get him, so he created walls and didn't allow himself to like things because he feared disappointment.

Now he figures disappointment isn't the worst thing that can happen. Nor is pain. He feels like a proper adult admitting that. But it's true, because he doesn't want to look back on his life when he's old and regret all the things he never did. If he just takes the leap he might even have someone to look back on life with him.

Zayn wraps the quilt tighter around himself and sighs. Never did he expect to come here and become a different person. He's still him, though. He'll always be Zayn.

Knocking on the door pulls him out of his reverie, and he quickly gets up to answer it. Inside it's much warmer so he drops the quilt on the bed before slowly opening to door, revealing a flustered looking Harry.

"You ok?"

"I know," Harry says instead of answering his question. Zayn doesn't know what he's supposed to do with that information, so he frowns and steps back to let Harry in the room.

"Know what, exactly?"

"Doniya told me."

Zayn crosses his arms. "Told you what?" His sister gave him time, but a few hours really isn't enough.

"Louis," is all Harry says, but it's all he needs to say. It's the name that has haunted him, had been the reason behind most of the decisions he made. Until now.

It's a strange thing, moving on. You don't really realise you've done it until someone says their name and you feel...free. When the joy someone else brings you becomes greater than your loss. But that joy is slowly changing into doubt as Zayn watches Harry and waits for that look.

"I don't need your pity," he bites at Harry, balling his hands into fists at his sides. He feels vulnerable without his arms covering his chest, but he needs to be strong.

Harry chuckles. "I know. And I don't pity you; I like you. A lot." Zayn feels like he's been caught in a whirlwind, or a room, with the walls slowly moving in on him. "Just thought you should know."

Suddenly he bursts free, like the walls evaporated and he can finally see Harry. See him standing right in front of him with this stupid smile on his face, as if the bastard already knows what Zayn is going to do next. He almost doesn't want to give him the satisfaction, but he's been waiting too long, so he surges forward and grabs Harry's face between his hands, finally connecting their mouths.

It's clumsy because they're both trying not to smile, their teeth clashing and breathing irregular, but it's perfect. Their lips seem to mould together like this is the sole purpose they were created for, and Zayn can't keep his hands still. They're all over Harry; squeezing his shoulders, running down his back and going up again to bury themselves in Harry's hair.

Zayn pulls away so he can look at him, see the smile that he caused. "I like you a lot, too," he murmurs, tucking a few stray hairs behind Harry's ear.

"Really? I never would have guessed."

Zayn laughs and kisses him again. "I could get used to this."

"Yeah? I wouldn't mind," Harry says and tugs Zayn even closer so he can almost feel him inhale before they move back in, mouths open. It's slow and deep, tongues sliding together wetly. Zayn can taste a hint of orange and something minty, probably from the gum he's always chewing. Not now, though.

Zayn pulls away, trying to keep in his laughter. "You knew I was going to kiss you."

"How do you know I knew?" Harry asks, keeping his arms rested around Zayn's neck.

"'Cause you're not chewing gum for once." Harry smirks and shrugs. "You bastard," Zayn laughs. He feels light, like he took off and is now floating somewhere between the clouds with the sun shining down on him.

"A man can hope. I also had a speech prepared, just in case. Looks like I didn't need it, after all," Harry sighs, letting his arms slide down a bit.

"A speech? How long did it take you to come up with that?"

"Not long. Finished it two days ago."

Zayn lets the meaning of that sink in while his fingers draw circles on the skin of Harry's hips, warm and soft. "Thank you, for waiting."

Harry nods. "It was worth it."

Zayn can't help but agree.

And so the fun begins.. :). The next update will be on Monday! Thank you for 1k reads! You lot are the best.

Laters xxx <3

Dedication: @OSnapItsZarry