Forgotten Emotions- A Star Wars Story (Part 2)

Chapter 10: Mistrust

// Warning: The bottom part of this chapter deals with a lot of mental stuff (I'm not an expert here, but I'm 99% sure Ahsoka has PTSD) And the Next chapter entails something that deserves its own warning. If you can't deal with it, skip to chapter 12 //

"Hey, ya lil' flirt," Hunter called behind her.

"Dank Ferriak, Hunter! I could have...you're gonna make me..." she sighed, calming down. "Welcome to the workshop, how can I help you?" she asked, spinning around in her chair.

"You seem a bit happier than normal."

"You noticed. No one else seems to. I think everything can finally be perfect for one day! Maybe even a few hours. That's all I want," she said, half-dancing in her chair.

"One perfect day with my family. And with Caleb," she looked dreamily into space. "Sorry, I got a little carried away there," she blushed lightly.

"A shell of happiness. What's on the inside?" Hunter asked. Ahsoka meditated for a moment before answering.

"A swarming sea of chaos, nervousness and 'can I really do this?'," she admitted, hanging her head.

"Come here," Hunter said, detaching his chestplate. He sat on the floor, inviting her to his lap. She nearly fell into his warmth.

"I really know what I want my present from Tech to be," she whispered to herself, leaning back into him.

"Wanna talk about it?" Hunter asked.

"I have to face my fears, and they got even bigger because I faced them last time."

"It's not one quick battle and done. It's a war. And I know you'll win," he nuzzled her.

"Thank you, little brother," she sighed happily. "What you told me, it seemed like it was so long ago. I still carry it with me. 'You always have the strength.'"

"You just need to use it," he finished. "So why haven't you used it?" Hunter asked.

"Because I've just been using the strength I was born with, I guess."

"Then how did you win Caleb over?" he asked. Ahsoka caught herself purring and blushing. She had used that strength to stay with Caleb. And to survive this long. This was just another test of her strength and trust in the Force.

"Thank you, Hunter!" she said, turning to hug him. "I'm totally purring right now," she whispered to him.

"Yep," he wrapped his arms around her.

"Ahsoka, we're here," Anakin announced, coming into the room. "Oh my Force! Does Caleb need to know that-"

"It's not what it looks like!" they said in unison.

"Just a brother-sister therapy session, I guess," Ahsoka said, getting up quickly. She pushed Anakin out, flipping Hunter his chestplate. "I really need a door-bell or something. I'm gonna end up hurting myself, jumping away from one of you nerf-herders surprising me in the doorway!" She glared at her family.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Anakin said, sitting back on the couch.

"I think you do!" Ahsoka said, pouncing onto him.

"We're here. Welcome home, guys," Caleb called from the cockpit.

"I'll take it from here, love," Ahsoka said, jumping to the cockpit.

"Ready to die, girl?" Palpatine asked.

"Frankly, no! I still have a whole life ahead of me!" Ahsoka fired back, igniting her lightsabers.

"No lightsabers, my dear," he chuckled. Ahsoka's sabers were forced to retract and drop out of her hands. "I will ask one more time. Ready to die?" He lifted her off the ground with his mind as she struggled in his grasp.

"Anakin! Caleb! Obi-Wan!" she cried, trying to free herself.

"Ah, ah, ah. No help for you, girl!" He snapped his fingers. They all appeared, their eyes blacker than the night.

"You failed me, Ahsoka! You are no longer worthy to be my daughter!" Anakin boomed.

"You failed me, too. You don't truly love me!"

"You are a failure to the Jedi Order. You have never been good enough! You will never be good enough!" Obi-Wan declared.

"No! Please, no! Sage, Silas!" she called. Sidious snapped again. They appeared together, their eyes were burning blackness like the boys.

"You failed us, Master! You failed me! You're not special! You're not unique! You're not worthy!" Sage yelled.

"No! Please!" Ahsoka cried again.

"You have no one, girl! It's time to die! Like you should have long ago!" Sidious cackled. Ahsoka's five Jedi opened their mouths.

"Feed us! Feed us! Feed us!" they chanted.

Ahsoka felt tingling all throughout her body. She couldn't move or talk. She felt her breathing become shallower and her heart slow as the life was slowly sucked out of her.

"This is the only time I get to do this to you, girl! Let us all savor the moment!" Sidious said, continuing to drain her Life Force away.

"No! Please no!" Images flashed across Ahsoka's mind.

"You are hereby barred from the Order," a Jedi Master echoed.

"You have been pledged guilty of treason against the Republic and are deemed subject to execution," Tarkin boomed.

"How dare you suggest the Republic surrender to the Separatists!" Master Windu shouted.

"Yes, little one. You are all alone. I would force you to embrace the dark side, but killing you now is so much more entertaining," Sidious cackled.

"I'm not guilty! Please, I'm innocent! Don't leave me!" Ahsoka mumbled, feeling the last of her life slip away.

"Anakin, please!" she begged with her last breath. Ahsoka's world went dark.

Ahsoka looked around, stunned by the light. Anakin was hovering over her. Everyone else was crowded around her.

"Anakin..." she mumbled softly.

"I'm right here, baby girl. I'm right here," he soothed, reaching to stroke her lekku. Ahsoka snarled weakly, jumping to a crawling position. She looked like a scared animal.

"You didn't even try to stop him! I am worthy to be your daughter!" she growled.

"What in the Galaxy? Ahsoka, of course you are. Come here," he pleaded. She turned to Caleb, her pupils slit.

"How could you still not believe that I love you? I would die for you!" she snarled.

"Soka! I believe you! What happened?" Caleb asked, trying to comfort her. She swatted his hand away, her fangs growing longer by the minute. She turned to Obi-Wan and snarled.

"All my life, I've been trying my best! Sure, I'm not the best person in the Galaxy, but at least I tried! You know that no one's good enough!" Tears streamed down her face as she continued hissing.

"Ahsoka, what in the Galaxy are you talking about?" he asked, reaching out to her. Like Anakin and Caleb, Ahsoka refused his comfort. She nipped his hand in defense. Ahsoka turned to Sage and Silas.

"I told you those things to comfort you! How could you do this?" she glared at Sage. Ahsoka backed up again, turning to everyone.

"Master?" Sage pushed her brother back in fear. Ahsoka lashed back to Anakin.

"You didn't even try to stop him! He killed me and you could have cared less!"