you & me. legal. forever.

7. The World's Worst Spy

The next few weeks flew by, and Bucky almost confessed what he was up to numerous times due to her concern for him seeming more distracted than usual. She sensed something was up but couldn't put her finger on it, chalking it up to stress. Zoe liked to tease him that he must have been the world's worst spy because he was incapable of keeping anything from her for long. To which he always corrected her that he was technically never a spy...

Zoe's birthday was the following day. She was not looking forward to it, but had let Bucky convince her to have a few people over the weekend closest to the actual day. Her birthday fell on a Friday, and her party was set for Sunday. Or so she was led to believe.

Sam, for all his teasing, was the one doing the last minute wrangling for the real party. He and Bucky set up everyone with accommodations and rides, worked it out with a neighbor where to hide the food and decorations, and had all the cover stories ready in case she got suspicious.

They were getting ready for bed when Bucky's phone rang. It was Sam, as usual, since his attention to time differences was negligible at best.

"Hey, is everything okay?" Bucky walked into the hallway. "What's wrong?"

"And hello to you, too, Tinman!" Sam huffed. "Why do you always think something is wrong when I call you?"

"Because it's after midnight where you are, you usually text unless it's urgent, and I'm a little on edge right now..." Bucky growled. "What's up?"

"Okay, so you might want to sit down for this one, old man..." Sam took a deep breath. "The cake won't be ready until after 2pm."

"Jesus, Sam!" Bucky laughed in relief. "I thought something was seriously wrong! That's no problem, we're not going to even be there until at least 1600, what's the big deal?"

"The big deal, Terminator, is that someone has to go pick it up, leaving them visible, maybe even me!" Sam was even more hard-headed when he was stressing. "What if someone sees me?! I will not be the one who blows this, man!"

"Calm down, Sam." Bucky chuckled at his anxiety. "Like I said, we are not due in until 1600, the bakery is 10 minutes from the house, and even if there's traffic, you'll still have plenty of time."

"But..." Sam tried to interject.

"Stop worrying, bird brain, we got this." Bucky cut him off. "All you need to worry about is corralling the guests until we get there." He took a deep breath. "And making sure she doesn't murder me, of course."

"Nah, I've been waiting to see that for 3 years, Buck!" Sam finally laughed. "You doing okay? How many times have you sweat through your shirt today just thinking about it?"

"More than I care to admit, thanks." Bucky sighed. "Please tell me again she's not going to run screaming the other way..."

"No promises, Ice Man. But if she hasn't run out on you so far, I think you'll be fine. Maybe try not to do anything to make her activate the fail safe in your arm and you should be good." Sam reassured his friend. "Hey, since it's after midnight here, is she up? I'll cover your ass by saying I was seeing if she was up to say happy birthday."

"Good strategy. Let me get her." Bucky walked into the bedroom. "Hey, you up for your first birthday greetings?" He asked Zoe, who was reading in bed.

"Fucking Wilson..." she smirked and held out her hand for his phone. "Samuel, you know it's rude to wake your elders..."

"Happy birthday, Z! You know how much I like to be the first one every year!" Sam laughed. "Plus this is 3 years running I beat your bionic boyfriend to it!"

"Technically it's not her birthday yet, dumbass!" Bucky yelled across the bed. "You're lucky she puts up with you!"

"He's not wrong, Sam." Zoe shook her head, trying not to laugh at her favorite idiots. "Are you still coming for a few days next week while Sarah and the boys are here?"

"Absolutely. Wouldn't miss it." Sam poured it on thick. "Still sucks that I'm gonna miss the party. Sarah promised to film your extremely pissed off face for me, cause we know how much you love birthdays..."

"Duty calls, Captain, I get it." Zoe replied. "Is Wanda still on the fence?"

"Depends on how the mission goes. You know the drill." Sam covered. "Though we could be done much faster if a certain cranky old man came with us..."

"Yeah, well, the cranky old man is finishing up some work for T'Challa, so he's busy solving problems with his brain instead of his fists." Zoe couldn't help herself. "You should try it sometime."

"Whatever." Sam snorted. "We can't all be literal super computers. Hey, it's still cool to bring Wanda, right? You won't be weird about it? You know, because she and Steve were so close..."

"Seriously, Samuel? Of course!" Zoe laughed at him. "She's great and I'd love to get to know her again...plus you seem pretty smitten, so any chance I can get to potentially embarrass you, bring it on!"

"Please do not embarrass me, Z! Sarah's bad enough!" Sam pleaded. "You sure? It's your birthday, just don't want you to feel obligated."

"You do realize who I'm currently sitting next to, right?" Zoe teased. "Literally living with Steve's best friend. Just because you know the truth about what happened between me and Rogers doesn't mean anything changes. I thought we were past this."

"We are, I just wanted to check." Sam sighed. "Thank you in advance for not humiliating me in front of her, if she's up for the trip."

"No promises..." Zoe chuckled. "Can we go to bed now?"

"Knock yourself out! Happy birthday, Zoe." Sam chirped. "See you next week!"

After hanging up the phone, Zoe noticed Bucky looking pensive again.

"You okay over there?" She asked, handing him his phone back and scooting over to his side of the bed. "What's on your mind?"

"Nothing, just tired." Bucky tried to convince them both. "I still can't believe I'm almost done with this internship..."

"Uh huh, sure..." Zoe saw right through him. "What's really going on? You worried about Sam again? You know I'm not going to get mad if you want to go on more missions. If you want to go blow shit up, go! It doesn't make what you do behind the scenes any less important, if you miss the action, have at it. I'm proud of you no matter what."

"Why are you so good to me?" Bucky leaned over and kissed her head. "Thank you for having my back. I just don't want to see Sam take on too much when I could be helping, that's all." He was relieved that he had more things to worry about than just his personal covert operation.

"He's got Wanda, she's worth more that both of you put together, right?" Zoe elbowed him. "Does Sam even need to be there if she's on the scene?"

"Say that to him!" Bucky laughed. "No, she's unbelievably strong and powerful and whatever, but the more eyes the better. Just don't want him to lose focus since he's a little bit in love with her, that's all."

"Never seemed to be a problem for you and Rogers..." Zoe winked.

"Really?!" Bucky grabbed her sides and started tickling her. "That's it! I don't care that it's almost your birthday! You're in so much trouble, young lady..."

"Stop it, Barnes!" She yelled while laughing hysterically. "I can't help that you guys were fucking obsessed with each other!" She was laughing so hard she was crying. "Goddamn it! Cut it out! I mean it!" She was trying to kick at him while he continued his attack. "Seriously! I'm gonna pee my pants!" She laughed and tried in vain to wriggle out of his arms. "Aaaah! Stop!" Then she accidentally kneed him in the groin and he grunted, releasing his grip to curl into a ball. "Oh no! Are you okay?!" She immediately tried to assess the situation and leaned over him.

"Best! Strategy! Ever!" He sprang up and started tickling her again. "You really are too easy, love..." he laughed maniacally, pulling her close and covering her face with sloppy wet kisses. "By the way, happy birthday..."

"Already?" She turned to look at the clock. "Fuck..."

"Come on, we're going to have an easy day, just like you wanted, eating too much cake and lazing with the dog." He smiled and kissed her cheek, unable to look her in the eye.

"If you insist..." she sighed. "Is it too early for cake?"

"Nope. Be right back." He smiled and hopped out of bed. As he grabbed the small store-bought cake from the fridge, he tried not to freak out about how the rest of the day would go. Deep breaths, you can do this, he told himself.