Secret Triangle | An ONF Fanfiction

Seungjun

I did it. I confessed. I couldn't believe it. So much nervousness and repressed feelings just to say two short phrases.
But it wasn't over. After overcoming one obstacle, I was met with a wall. And whether it would be destroyed didn't depend on me anymore. I did what I had to do. At that moment, all I could do was stay silent and wait for their reaction.

A heavy silence pervaded the room again. I was staring down at the table, while occasionally checking on both Yuto and Jaeyoung from the corner of my eye. The worst was yet to come, I thought to myself. Not only did I have feelings for one of them, but for both?! There was no way something between any of us would have worked out. Even if, for some reason, even just one of them liked me back, it would still be impossible to have a concrete relationship. I did not want to leave anyone out. It was all or nothing. And the latter was definitely the most plausible outcome to that whole situation.

But I had already put my mind to rest about that. I wasn't expecting anyone to return my feelings when I decided to confess. I just wanted to let it out. I felt like these feelings were starting to devour me from the inside. I'm usually very straightforward about my sentiments, but this was different. It was so different I just couldn't keep it in. The only thing I wanted in return was for our friendship not to fall apart. We only had each other. And even if things would get awkward between us after that, I just wanted to stay close to them. To have someone to count on and for them to have someone to trust. Friends of boyfriends, it didn't really matter.
Of course, it wouldn't be easy to live knowing I like them more than platonically, but I could live with that. What I feared most was how they'd receive the news. I knew Jaeyoung had a boyfriend in high school, so I bet he'd at least understand where I'm coming from. Meanwhile Yuto... I wasn't sure how he'd react. I've never heard him talk about his past love life, his crushes or anything really. Clearly, there was a chance of him just never experiencing these things, and that was totally fine. Not sharing was of course fine too. But when Jaeyoung mentioned his ex-boyfriend, whom he's still on good terms with, about a week ago, Yuto was awfully quiet. More than usual. Maybe it was just my impression, but something about him changed since we got released from prison. Our cells were close, so I don't think we had different experiences, and we were relatively fine after being freed. Maybe realization hit him later and he was experiencing some kind of trauma.

Or maybe it was something else completely.

Seconds upon seconds were passing. Overall, maybe one minute passed since I made my final confession, but it felt like ages. Reading the room was difficult. I wasn't able to figure out what was going on in Jaeyoung and Yuto's minds, but it was clear they were thinking of something to say. I was patient though. They didn't even have to give me an immediate response.
But as I was about to speak up to tell them I could wait, Yuto spoke, saying something that caught me completely off guard.

"Seungjun, you're not the only one who feels this way."

My eyes widened. I thought I was imagining things because I was tired. But then he went on, and I understood that what I was hearing were indeed real words coming out of his mouth.

"I like you too Seungjun. And you too, Jaeyoung."

He spoke with a confidence I had never seen in him before. It was as if he got possessed by a completely different person. He was the last person I'd expect to speak up loud and clear as he had just done. But his words sounded so true, so genuine. They had an oddly reassuring aura to them, a certain warmth. And it was then that I realized that maybe he had been hiding these feelings for a long time too, and when he finally let them out, he felt free. He had nothing to lose, because part of his feelings was indeed reciprocated by me.

Either way, I felt relieved. So relieved that the corners of my mouth spontaneously curved upwards in a smile. Yuto must have noticed it, because he looked at me and smiled back, revealing all of his teeth in that smile I love so much. He has one of the most beautiful smiles I've ever seen, and I am not exaggerating. Needless to say, he made me blush a little, as I felt my face getting a bit warmer.

We were unable to say anything, but we didn't need words. Our minds connected on the same wavelength, and we immediately knew what to do. Almost as if we were pre-programmed robots, we turned to look at Jaeyoung and said, in unison:

"What about you, Jaeyoung?"