Imperfectly Perfect [Chaelisa]

seventy six

When Chaeyoung bursts into her room without warning, Lisa is more than a little confused. She sits up, feeling a little underdressed, since she's in her PJs and hasn't exactly left her bed yet, but she doesn't care as much when she sees Chaeyoung's distressed expression.

"Are you okay, Rosie?" Lisa asks when Chaeyoung throws her bomber jacket on the ground and stares at it angrily.

Chaeyoung huffs, and pulls off the t-shirt she's wearing, and then unbuttons her jeans and strips them off, tossing them all in a messy pile and glaring at it. Then, she pulls her underwear off, drops them on the ground, and with a loud sigh, climbs into bed next to Lisa, cuddling up to her and pulling the blankets over them.

"Um..." Lisa frowns when Chaeyoung stays silent. "Not that I don't love the strip tease, but what are you doing here? We didn't plan to meet today."

Chaeyoung whines and cuddles up to her, her eyes screwed shut. Lisa catches on to what's happening pretty quickly.

"Are you nonverbal, baby?" Lisa asks, and Chaeyoung finally nods in response. Lisa wraps her arms around Chaeyoung's waist, and with one hand, makes sure to give her girlfriend tummy rubs. "Okay. Did you go into sensory overload?"

When Chaeyoung shakes her head, Lisa frowns. She doesn't know what could've made Chaeyoung upset. "Are you stressed?"

At that, Chaeyoung nods, and her grip on Lisa tightens. Lisa wonders what Chaeyoung could be stressed about, because it's not like her girlfriend got like this around exam season, when Lisa was constantly freaking out. Chaeyoung was the level headed one. Chaeyoung had been calm the whole time they were studying together, telling Lisa, 'I know I'm going to get good grades, I'm smart, I have a 5.0 GPA, so I don't need to worry'.

With no exams, and it being summer, and the fact they have no responsibilities at the moment, Lisa isn't entirely sure what could be wrong, and Chaeyoung can't tell her.

She feels Chaeyoung's cool fingers against hers, and instead of holding her hand, Chaeyoung plays with her fingers, humming to herself, her eyes still closed. Lisa spots Nala on the floor, in the messy pile Chaeyoung had tossed her clothes in, and leans down to get her. She hears Chaeyoung's whine in protest as she moves away to get the stuffed lion, but when Lisa cuddles up to her again, and presses Nala into her arms, Chaeyoung's eyes open and she beams down at her lion.

Lisa kisses Chaeyoung's forehead and smiles. "When you can talk, let me know what's wrong, okay? We can fix it together. Just focus on calming down for now."

Chaeyoung stays close to Lisa, and the younger girl scrolls through her Tumblr dashboard with one hand, and give Chaeyoung tummy rubs with the other. After almost an hour of sitting in almost silence - Lisa makes sure to hum along to some songs, mostly a few of her own she'd written, because she knows it makes Chaeyoung calm - Chaeyoung finally shifts and detaches herself from Lisa's side.

Lisa watches as Chaeyoung gently sets Nala down on one of her pillows, pats the lion on the head, and looks over at Lisa with wide eyes. Chaeyoung doesn't meet her gaze, and opts to stare at her neck. "I am upset."

"Well, yeah," Lisa answers, "I figured. What upset you?"

Chaeyoung collapses into Lisa's arms again with a loud sigh. "I don't- I don't think I want to go to college."

Lisa blinks at her in shock. "Chaeyoung... but like, you- you've been so excited to go and study animals. What's changed?"

"Exactly!" Chaeyoung raises her voice and taps rapidly against her knees with her palms. "That's why."

Lisa frowns. "You don't want to study animals anymore? Then just... do art."

"No, not that," Chaeyoung cuts herself off with a long hum, but continues, "I like lions. But- but... I don't want it to be different."