Letters to Him#Wattys2016

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Twelve

"Are you alright?" He asked her, just a few hours before her surgery.

"Alhumdulillah Ameer. I feel hopeful, Indeed Allah does not despair His servants from His mercy." She said with a smile on her face. She looked weak and gaunt, like the slightest movement of the wind would take her afar. But yet that one radiant smile of hers lit up her whole face and made her seem like the epitome of beauty.

"You look beautiful." He said caressing his hand on her face lightly, hoping that maybe that one sentence would convey what he felt when he saw her.

"And you are delusional Ameer." She said shaking her head lightly at him.

"If only you could see what I saw every time I looked at you. Then maybe you would understand." He said running his fingers over her face.

"Maybe I do." She said giving him a cheeky smile. He shook his head at her getting what she meant and before he could say anything the doctor had arrived.

Good Morning Mr. Khan and Ms. Ahmed. How are you doing today?"

"Alhumdulillah." They both replied in unison.

"Very well then. Are you ready for the surgery Ms. Ahmed?" The doctor asked.

"Yes I am." She said boldly. Yet Ameer could see the gears in her head running 100 miles per minute. He wouldn't say she was afraid. She was just nervous if it would work or not.

"Excellent. You will be wheeled into the OT in a while so just gear up mentally. I hope you will take care Mr. Khan." The doctor said.

"I will." He said with determination in his voice.

"Ok then see you in the OT."The doctor said as he went out without waiting for a reply.

"You ok?" He asked her holding her fragile hand in his large ones. Her hands were cold, like they usually were now a days. There were times when he would flinch away from the coldness of her hands after she had been to the kitchen. But now? It didn't affect him as it used to. How times have changed.

"Alhumdulillah Ameer. I'm fine. In fact I feel like I can take on a battle now." She said with a smile.

"You could consider the transplant as a battle and the OT as the battlefield." He said teasingly.

"It is a battle in a way Ameer." She wondered out loud, afar away look in her eyes. "Can we switch topics?" She asked after a minute.

"Why not?" He said almost desperately.

And like that they spoke about anything and everything.

*

They waited outside the operation theatre. Ameer pacing down the hallway nervously. Her friends leaning against the wall and tapping their feet. Hamza was seated as he couldn't strain much but one could clearly see the despair and worry in his eyes.

It wasn't a huge surgery but nonetheless they all were worried. Qamar had been through so much. First their separation, then her cancer and then the loss of their child. He prayed to Allah that Qamar made out of the theatre just fine, like how she was before.

It was nerve racking standing and waiting for the doctors to come out and say everything was fine. He bounced his leg up and down for the anticipation was killing him.

Exactly two hours later the bulb of the operation theatre switched off and the doors opened. The doctor walked in surgical scrubs with a smile on his face. Ameer practically ran towards the doctor.

"Is everything alright doctor?" He asked his heart thudding loudly.

"Yes Mr. Khan. Your wife's transplant was successful. She is being prepared to be wheeled to her ward. She will be under observation for a while and if there are no complications then she will be ready to go home." He said with a smile. Ameer felt like his life was coming back to him. He let out a sigh of relief.

He could hear a chorus of Alhumdulillah around him. The doctor was gone, when he left he had no idea. The doors of the OT opened again and Qamar was being wheeled back. She was unconscious, but she looked fine.

He followed them to her ward and watched them shift her back on her bed.

"Please don't overcrowd the place. The patient needs as much rest as she can get so only one patient is allowed at a time." The nurse told him. He nodded at her and went inside the room to look at Qamar.

She was sleeping peacefully. He held her hand and dropped a kiss on it.

"I'm so proud of you Qamar." He whispered dropping a kiss again and going out of the room for he knew her brother, his parents and the others wanted to see her. Hamza went in as soon as he left the room and he walked towards the prayer room after telling his mother, for he wanted to thank Allah for giving him Qamar back.

*

"Hey." She said breaking him from his thoughts. He hadn't even realized she was up because he was in deep thought.

"Hey. How are you feeling?" He asked her dropping a kiss on her hand.

"Good, alhumdulilah. I feel tired but Alhumdulillah, for it could have been worse." She said with a smile on her face.

He looked at her face, there were frown lines on her forehead. She looked from all of this, but yet she smiled and said Alhumdulillah and to him there was nobody braver and beautiful than her. Guilt gnawed at him; to think he was the cause of her pain hurt him too much and yet here she was smiling at him. He felt ashamed of himself, marrying for the second time was not wrong, neglecting her was wrong, betraying her was wrong and breaking her heart time and again was wrong, leaving her to fight her disease alone was wrong. No matter how sorry he felt he could never go back and undo the past.

"I am so sorry Qamar. I should have been there for you. But I left you alone. I am so sorry." He said, guilt dripping from his voice.

"IT's ok Ameer. What has happened has happened. Just promise me, promise me that you won't leave me alone again. It gets too lonely without you, please. "She said, her eyes imploring him.

"I promise Qamar. I won't leave your side, ever." He said, although somewhere in his heart he was afraid; what if he broke his promise? So he made a promise to himself that he would stay by her side through thick and thin.

She smiled so beautifully that her whole face seemed to light up and her face twinkled as if to show that his promise had blown all her fears away. His heartbeat raised at that. He will fulfill her promise, he assured himself and tried to calm down.

Alas, some promises were meant to be broken.