Letters to Him#Wattys2016

Chapter Ten

Chapter Ten

He was nervous, sure he had been nervous many times in his life. But this time was a bit different. Qamar was to undergo the Bone marrow transplant but before that she needed to go through another series of chemotherapy session. Hamza was on the dot donor for Qamar so there really was no need for another donor. He knew her cancer would disappear in sha Allah. But he feared the side effects of this surgery and the whole surgery in itself.

Qamar was being prepared for the chemo session so he thought he would be with Hamza, who was being tested since he was the donor. Now he was heading back to Qamar's room after he was sure everything with Hamza was done for today. His part of the surgery was appointed to take place a day or two prior to Qamar's surgery. He opened the door to her room and entered in.

A nurse was sitting with her since he had asked her to. Qamar's head snapped up from her book a smile breaking out her face. He smiled back at her. He loved it when you she smiled. Her whole face beamed when she smiled. The nurse excused herself.

"Assalamualaikum, How are you Qamar?" He asked sitting beside her, holding her hand that was free from the IV drip.

"Walaikumasalam, Alhumdulillah. How is Hamza?" She asked concern flickering in her eyes.

"He is fine. He is done with all the tests for now. After the results come in he will be prepared for his part of the surgery." He said debriefing her.

"Alhumdulillah. Did he leave?" She asked.

"Yeah he was very tired so I sent him home. I have to tell he is one heck of a stubborn person. I literally had to threaten him to send him home." He said smiling at the memory of it.

"Well that is Hamza Ahmed for you. He won't he won't be Hamza if he wasn't stubborn." She said laughing at her brother.

"Yeah true that. Point is you, madam need to rest. I can see you fighting with sleep." He said with a patronizing tone.

"Yeah I know but I don't want to sleep. It gets worse after I wake up." She said whining, a sign that she was tired; of what he had no idea. She could be tired of this chemo and this cancer as a whole or she was tired of resting. Nonetheless he felt his heart constrict at it. How he wished she would recover after this. He prayed she did.

"It's ok Qamar. I'll be right here when you wake up and together we will fight this. Besides we have Allah with us, don't we? Now sleep you need the rest." He said with a soothing tone running his hand through her hair.

"Yes we do." She said her eyes drooping. He ran his fingers in her hair. It took her a while to sleep but she did sleep.

No that she was asleep he let his fear creep in. He had no idea how he was going to take care of her since he had no idea how painful it was going to be. He feared to see her in pain and not being able to do anything especially when he didn't know what to do.

Fear, when just a noun was nothing. But when associated to a living breathing being it crippled the person to its height. He could feel it crippling him too. But he couldn't let it win. He needed to fight his fears for Qamar. He could feel his flight instinct take on but he curbed it. He fought with it for Qamar's sake.

'You always ran away from your fears Ameer and you hurt her in turn. But now you won't run away. It's high time you face your fears and get over it.' He said to himself, holding her hand snuggling himself deeper into her side.

*

"Oww." Someone gasped out making Ameer fumble and drop his head down which was being supported by his hand. He opened his eyes and got up abruptly. He frowned what happened. It seemed like he had lost focus. It took him a minute to gather his bearings when he realized he had fallen asleep; he presumed, while looking at her. Another gasp made him snap out form his sleepy daze and that is when he had realized that it was Qamar who was gasping.