Surprisingly Royal

👸 Chapter 34 : Sorry

I gently open the door trying as much as possible not to make any form of noise.

As I make my way to my room, I notice mum sitting at the living room with her  eyes slightly closed.

I think of just going into my room in order to prevent any form of conversation but I decide against it since sooner or later I'd have to face the music anyways.

"There is surely a reasonable explanation for all this" Carlos' words continuously play in my head trying it's best to motivate me in talking things out with mum.

It seems to work since I find myself walking towards the living room.
I finally get there and I sit at the other side of the room.

She gently opens her eyes and she sits upright . She begins to play with her fingers and this tells me that she is as nervous as I am.

We sit there for like 10 minutes without saying anything to each other.

I'm the one to break the silence by asking her if she wants a cup of tea since I'm going to make one for myself.

" Yeah I'd like that." She says in the lowest tone possible

I make my way to the kitchen and I start making the tea.

I hope all this turns out right and I hope I'm just misunderstanding certain things because that's just the reasonable explanation I can give to all this.

I finish making the tea and head straight into the living room.

" thanks" she says after taking her cup.

I take my seat and the place goes silent once again.

" I'm sorry for how I spoke to you earlier . I should have waited for an explanation before storming out of the house like that. It wasn't right" I tell her breaking the silence again.

" I understand you Ciara. There is nothing wrong with how you reacted to all this. I'm sure anyone in your shoes would literally do the same." She says placing her cup on the glass table.

I say nothing and I just play with my teacup.

" I'm sorry for the way you found out about everything. It shouldn't have been like that."

" Mum......."

"Yeah"

" nothing in that letter makes sense to me. I'm sure I didn't read it well or its just a big misunderstanding I have here because nothing in there is true right?"

" Ciara I'm so sorry" she says on the verge of crying.

" Mum please don't do this now okay . The last thing I want to see is you crying right now. I'm so confused about this whole thing.

" I understand the way you are feeling right now okay but then whatever you read in there is absolutely the truth.  I should have told you this myself instead of you reading it and I'm so sorry for that."

" you absolutely don't understand the way I'm feeling okay. It's not as If you are the one living a complete lie . I've lived all my life thinking you are the only parent I have not knowing it's a complete lie. This is so not fair mum. Should I be even calling you that ?.
All that is written in there is just bullshit  and its going to remain that way." I say storming out of the living room straight into my room.

" Ciara...." I hear her shout

I totally ignore her and just keep walking into my room.

Immediately I get in, I just walk straight to my bed and fall on it.

I don't know what kind of prank this is but it's so not cool.

I hear a gently knock on my door and mum just enters without permission.

" I don't remember telling you to come in you know " I say facing the other side of the room.

" I don't need permission to come in here and you know that." She says sitting next to me.

I just row my eyes and pick up a pillow

"Maybe I don't actually know how you are feeling and maybe I can't even do anything about it but at least Just hear me out and you can decide on whatever you want to do okay."

" I don't want to listen to anything mum. I've already made my decision and nothing will change that. "

" Yeah sure but just listen to me this once okay ... please.." she says holding her ears.

" Fine.... just 5 minutes and nothing more."

"Thanks dear ' she says squeezing my hand.

I remove my hand and place them on my thighs.

I see a flash of hurt in her eyes but I just ignore it since I don't want to give in to whatever she is about to say so easily.

She begins to talk and I feel my heart breaking into a thousand pieces.