I'd be lying if I said I don't get choked up much
I cry a lot actually
but its been two years so I thought I could go without getting choked up by saying your name
it's been 2 years so I thought I'd be okay
its just 5 letters
5 letters that weren't even your name when we drifted, you'd changed it.
i always wonder why you changed it back
did you want to rid of what I tainted?
it's just 5 letters
5 letters I can't get out without feeling a lump in my throat
it's just 5 letters
5 letters that took up so much space and time I could've become them
it's just 5 letters
5 letters that make up who you where
5 letters
where
past tense
not anymore
you've changed
why didn't you keep your name
4 letters
that I barely even got to say
you entered a new era I wasn't really there for
4 letters
I only said when I was weeping for you
4 letters
that didn't even stay long enough to form their own person in my mind
I can say those 4 letters and be okay
but if you add one more, all hell breaks loose.
it's just 5 letters
5 letters that haunt me day by day
5 letters that when I think of, I hope you're okay
![](https://img.wattpad.com/cover/209463524-288-k41581.jpg)
YOU ARE READING
Whispered Thoughts and Screaming Lines
PoetryMy attempts at poetry Trigger warning for every poem Mentions of: suicide, self harm, eating disorders, dysphoria, etc. Most poems are written as spoken word so if they sound weird when you read them that's why