FBI (For Basic Idiots) [FemStiles&Derek]

Wererabbits

“Shit, Scott.” Stiles tuts and huffs and tries to find a goddamn pen and some clean paper under all the chaos on her desk. “You sure it’s not just a normal homicide?” She can only hope as she asks, finally finds a pen, and even her notepad. “‘Cause if so, you should just call Jordan instead.”

“Well, whatever it was ripped this poor woman’s heart right out and probably took it with them. We already checked the area for it. Malia and Derek are double-checking as we speak. You were coming to visit anyway...” Scott’s voice is a little quieter on that last part, but clearly holds humour.

Stiles narrows her eyes, phone pressed between her shoulder and ear as she quickly jots down a less scruffy and rushed version of the notes on her last closed case – ready to type up into a polished off report later tonight. “I’m visiting to spend Christmas with my family. I didn’t sign up for more work on my vacation. And are you sure it wasn’t a wendigo?” She grumbles out, reaches over for her now only slightly warm coffee and downs the rest of it quickly enough to avoid most of the stale taste.

“Oh, come on. As if it’s even work for you. You’re good at this stuff. You’re Batman and I’m Batman’s bloodhound.” Scott says, sounds ever chipper – he really can’t wait to see her, it’s been too long. “Oh, and I’m sure it wasn’t a wendigo. They have a really particular... peculiar scent.”

“OK, fine, whatever. I’ll see you tomorrow, either way.” Stiles huffs, but can’t deny she feels excited to see everyone... and maybe just a little more excited to see a certain “sour wolf.”

“Awesome! It’ll be just like old times. Lydia and Malia can’t wait to see you almost as much as me.” Scott chimes out, clearly excited.

Stiles chuckles, drops her pen onto the pad, and takes an actual moment from her work. “Oh, I doubt that’s even possible.” She humours him, smiles at his absolutely adorable and infectious laugh. “What about Derek? Doesn’t he miss me, too?” She asks, tries to sounds as jokingly casual as possible as she leans back in her chair and stares up at the ceiling fan.

Scott wants to taunt her, only, he wants to see her face first, so for now, he holds back, instead, scoffs and tells her, “No idea. He still doesn’t share his feelings with me unless it’s wolf related. But I think the only thing he misses right now is the peace and quiet. Orphaned pack of wolves arrived at the house. Derek and I saved them from being killed by hunters – the usual hunter bullshit. They’re real good kids, sweet and look after each other well, but the oldest one is, like, 14, so Derek and I are literally parents right now... it’s exhausting.” Scott adds the last part quietly, as if suddenly realising just how exhausted he is.

Stiles chuckles again – because bless his sweet and caring Scott heart and brave and responsible True Alpha soul.

“My mom and Malia have been real helpful, though. You know what my mom’s like, and Malia has turned out to be quite a bit of mother hen. It’s kinda sexy.” Scott says that last part, too, like he’s only just realised it, but this time, he sounds less tired and more thrilled.

Stiles grins mischievously into her phone, grips it tight and leans forward in her seat. “Oh, yeah? You want your own little litter with Mimi, huh?” She can’t help teasing, grin widening slowly when she hears him groan.

“The litter thing is offence, just so you know.” Scott grumbles out.

“Noted.” Stiles leans back in her seat again with a triumphant grin slapped across her face. “And you didn’t deny it. You want little werebabies. That’s so adorable, I’m gonna cry myself to sleep tonight.”

“I really did miss you, but also, I hate you right now.” Scott drawls out after a moment of silence.

Stiles cackles, nods curtly at Steve – her assistant – when he knocks lightly on the open doorway to her office. When he silently slips the photocopies onto her desk, she whispers her thanks and politely motions for him to close the door behind him before continuing.

“If you’re busy, I can just call you back, if you want.” Scott says, sensitive ears picking up the rustling of papers and footsteps that clearly aren’t hers.

“No, you’re good, don’t worry. I’m heading home a little bit.” Stiles easily assures him.

“OK, cool. I’ll let Jordan know you’re gonna take a look. Shall I... I dunno... ask him if it’s possible to leave the crime scene as it is until you get here?”

“Don’t worry about that, either. Logan already gave him a call. How come he’s not there now? He let you wolves do your thing first?” Stiles starts off curious, then pauses, then sounds more confused as she asks, “Aren’t hellhounds supposed to have better noses than you wolves?”

“He had to go pick Allison up from school, ‘cause Lydia’s working late again.”

“Ah.” Stiles winces, even though there’s a fond smile tugging at her lips. “Poor baby’s not gonna let that slide for the third time in two weeks.”

Scott quietly chuckles. “That’s pretty much what Malia said.”

“What’d I say? Who’s that? Is that Stiles?”

Stiles grins, doesn’t need sensitive wolf ears to hear her friend’s typically loud and carefree sounding voice. “Hey, Malia. Miss you.” She chimes sweetly, knows she doesn’t have to raise her voice for the coyote to hear – apparently, they have better hearing than the wolves, as well as being able to creep up on them.

“Hey! No snatching!”

Stiles chuckles as she hears a bunch of shuffling noises before hearing Malia’s voice, clear as day.

“We haven’t seen you in four months. What the hell?” Her words are as blunt and accusing as her oddly calm tone.

“Busy saving lives. Like you guys, I’m sure.” Stiles is simply too tired to get into the details of anything right now, just wants to be in bed already, with a nice big Cuban cigar and a glass of single malt whiskey (nothing too fancy.)

Malia scoffs, but sounds slightly defeated as she mumbles out, “I suppose that’s a reasonable excuse.”

Stiles chuckles. “I’ll see you all tomorrow. You’ve got me for three whole weeks. I’m with you for Christmas and New Year, the whole shebang.”

There’s a pause before Malia’s quiet, but quite serious question pops out, “Are you bringing us Christmas gifts?”

“Malia!” Scott disapprovingly exclaims in the background.

“Oh, get a grip! It’s Stiles. She appreciates my forwardness. Unlike you.”

“I literally took a bullet to the chest for you this morning. Don’t even with the questioning of my love for you, OK? OK.” Scott’s words are sweet – like they are most of the time, because Scott’s just a sweetheart in general – however, his tone is more than snooty, and slightly offended.

“OK! Fine! Sorry!” Malia snips, though sounds defeated again.

“That’s OK!”

“OK, good!”

Stiles laughs, forgot how funny Malia and Scott were without even meaning to be funny, almost forgot how much she missed them all. Her family... her pack.

“You wanna ditch Derek for half hour?” Scott asks after a beat of silence, both their breathing now low, their gazes heated as she stares back at him with those amazing baby blue eyes of her.

There’s a pause before Malia replies with an all too eager. “Yes, absolutely.”

“What the fuck?” Stiles mumbles to herself, is then almost yelling into her phone. “Hey! No!” She can already hear their lips smacking together, hangs up immediately, grits her teeth in annoyance and mutters, “At least have the decency to hang up this time, you pair of wererabbit assholes.”