She's My Killer (girlxgirl) [Completed]

Chapter Four: Weird Vibes

The days that I don't have to work are worse than the days that I do have to work.

When I was going to school, it was a lot different and a little better. I didn't have to deal with Sage and his bullshit, so I was mostly dealing with my own shit.

But now that I'm out of school, Sage is all up on me about stupid shit. It's driving me crazy to the point where I'm ready to just leave and be homeless.

He has gotten so bad over the past few years and I couldn't figure out what the problem was or why he was acting the way he's been acting.

I want to say it's the accident that traumatized him cause I'm still traumatized as well, but I'm not treating him like shit the way he's treating me.

When we get into arguments, I feel like he's feeling pain from what happened and he's taking it out on me. Which, I completely understand but what I don't understand was everything else about him.

His work that he claims he's been doing for a few years and won't tell me what he does. I don't ask too many times but when he's coming home late or giving things to Raj from the back of his truck is when I start asking questions.

But since I don't have to work today and I have nothing else to do, I'm home alone right now bored out of my mind.

Sage was off doing work and I don't know when he'll come home.

He comes home whenever.

Which is weird.

I know there's something going on, but I can't figure out what it was. I knew my curiousity was getting to me cause it's strange when I watch him come home late and he's sneaking into the house.

But as I keep thinking about what he's doing, makes me remember that our father was the same way. I remember him coming home late, acting weird but I don't think it's the same thing.

I never knew what my own father did either.

My mother worked as a receptionist in a hospital, so that was the only normal person in our family besides me as well.

But talking about my parents never is a good thing cause it makes me go into a dark hole from the accident.

I tend to leap over the conversation.

Nobody knows about, including Izzy. I don't talk about personal things with anyone and since I don't have any friends, besides Izzy, then I don't have to worry about keeping shit from anyone.

Which isn't their business when it comes to that anyway.

Me and my brother are the only ones we have now.

It's been a rough few years.

I blame the accident on my depression sometimes and how I act towards people. I always tend to not give a shit when it comes to showing emotions towards people cause of my trauma.

If that has anything to do with it.

My emotions are so bottled up that I know it's not healthy. I didn't care as long as I don't lose myself over all of this shit and fall down an even deeper hole.

Sometimes I don't even feel like myself anymore and Sage isn't making it any better.

When I'm work, I feel somewhat ok but all the negativity follows me there as well. I have to constantly deal with stress and anger that it doesn't seem fair sometimes.

I've had a shitty life and it continues to get even worse.

With my parents gone, and living with my pshycho brother, it seems like I'm out of place in this world and it's not for me.