THE HAPPIEST GIRL | JENLISA

Chapter 67

Jennie

2 years later

I walk down the busy backstage hallways, the buzz of the crowd echoing off the walls. When I reach the door at the end of the hall, I rap my knuckles on the door softly three times before opening it.

"Fifteen minutes until show time." I announce, sticking my head in the dressing room.

"Okay. Thanks, Jennie." Kaia gives me a small acknowledging smile through the vanity mirror she is sitting in front of as her makeup artist sprays more hairspray in her long dark brown locks. I return the smile and close the door behind me. Gripping my clipboard tightly to my chest, I walk back down the hallway, ready to do one more run-through to make sure that everything is moving smoothly and on schedule.

Tonight is Kaia's first big headlining show. A local L.A. radio station is sponsoring her show at a theatre downtown that's packed with people. All day I've been running around with Kaia, doing multiple things with the radio station sponsoring her show. She spent all morning at the station on air to promote the show and her music, followed by multiple interviews, and then going to the theatre for sound check and a meet and greet with fans.

I started working for Kaia as a personal assistant about four months ago when she started to blow up after the release of her first EP. It was a real struggle for me to decide whether to take this job or not, to dip my toes back in the water after a long time. But I decided that it would be good for me to get back to what I used to love.

After being forced to leave my last job with Lisa, I fell into a bit of a mid-life crisis. When I went back home, I refused to tell my dad and the rest of the guys what really happened in fear of them legitimately plotting Hyun-suk's murder. Instead, I just told them that the job wasn't working out, and I wasn't sure if I even wanted to work in this industry anymore. I was so heartbroken and mortified over everything that went down that I seriously considered never working in this business again.

When I got back home, all I wanted to do was lock myself away in my room and never come out. The guys became really concerned about me at one point. I was even concerned about myself, but who could I talk to? The guys begged me to go back out on the road with them, but I couldn't stomach the thought of working my way back down the ladder and somehow accidentally spilling the beans on what actually happened with my last job. Instead, I did the unthinkable. The absolute last thing I thought that I would do. I called my mother.

Feeling so low and insecure, I began to panic on what to do next. Touring was my whole life, and after everything that happened, I couldn't wrap my head around the craziness of starting life out on the road again with a whole new person and team. Without Lisa. So what could I do with my life then? Touring and eventually becoming a manager had always been my dream, but after everything that went down, I became very unsure.

Nights spent alone at home, all I could hear in the silence was my mother's nagging voice ringing in my head. I could hear her clearly telling me that I'm a failure and she was right, life out on the road is not a stable career. It'll never pay the bills and I'll regret not getting a degree ten years from now.

One night, the voices in my head and the devil on my shoulder finally became too much. In a bout of sheer panic over my future, I called my mother in the middle of the night. She wasn't pleased at first with me for waking her up at nearly one in the morning, but after I told her that she was right, she became a little more eager to talk to me.

After all these years, she finally got her wish. I had her enrol me into college classes to try for a nursing degree like her. Granted, she wanted me to move back to Ohio and go to the university she went to, but I refused. I knew my limits. I knew I could not stand living with her and her new perfect little family in their mini mansion for more than ten minutes. I was willing to give up my dream, but not my home.