LOSING YOU

Chapter 77- California

I leave the airport. The air in the USA is far more distinct from India... It's cleaner, it's foreign and it's already not helping me anyway. I miss some home-like feeling in this cold world. Oh god, I miss Kabir. I wish I could have done something, I wish he could have kept his composure as usual and would listen to me. But, wishes and reality seldom go hand in hand. Anyway, I look around the airport terminal and spot Ava's bodyguard, Rodrick. Tall to 6'4, probably the most gigantic man to exist, not a single sentiment on his face, hair freshly gelled and perfectly styled, and a pair of black shades covering his eyes. Who the hell wears shades in the evening? Oh, yeah. Bodyguards do. Why? No idea. I walk over to him, and he takes my luggage and loads it in the car.

"Hi, Rodrick." I smile at the huge man.

"Ms. Mehra." He acknowledges me with a neutral expression. He opens the door and I climb into the car. He drives through the busy streets of California in complete silence. I try to keep shut because he doesn't seem to be the talkative kind but the traffic takes my patience to hell.

"How are you?" I blurt out. Uhhh.

"I'm fine. Thank you." A clipped response and graceless silence.

"Great," I mumble. I was hoping we could make a conversation so that I could keep my mind off Kabir and Myra... But this guy is... I can't blame him, he's just doing his job. He's not supposed to be listening to my shitty life stories... Huh. I'm not feeling good. What will I tell Ava and Gaurav? What is gonna happen? Will I ever get to see Myra again? My eyes are already prickling with tears before we make it to Ava's place. I realize how far I am from both of them. I might never be able to have what I had with Kabir, I might never go back to my country. I wipe my eyes as we enter the place. Wow. This place is huge. It's... Regal? Yeah, sort of. Soaring trees, a prominent pool, and fabulous lighting. Well done Fatty and Ava. I get out of the car and Rodrick takes out my things. Ava and Gaurav come out of the mansion. Sorry, Ava sprints out of the mansion and envelops herself around me. I do the same, I hug her tightly as she repeatedly kisses the side of my face. Her home-like vibe wraps around my shattered soul.

"I missed you so much! I love you! I can't believe you're here, Siya! I love you so much!" She pulls away from me and a frown covers her smile as she absorbs my expression.

"You... You look terrible. Come here." She opens her arms again and I melt into her embrace. I tightly hug her for a long time while Fatty rubs my back.

"Let's get inside," Ava whispers. She takes my hand and pulls me into her home. This place is lovely, a little bit of both Ava and Gaurav. You can't call the place too vanilla or too kaleidoscopic. It's perfect. It's more like a home... their home. I smile as I visualize them bickering over what color the couch should've been, the color of the walls, and the position of the television. Contentment and warmth crawl under my skin. I wish I could attend their wedding. I was supposed to be Ava's maid of honor and Kabir was the Best man, but I had my treatment going on back then and Kabir was too scared to leave me alone, so he too didn't attend their wedding. Both of us had to satisfy ourselves with the wedding pictures... My fucking fate. I sit on the couch. Getting a beautiful view of nighttime California through their floor-to-ceiling windows. Trees and lush greenery could be felt, despite the dark, some light penetrated through the dense flora. It was soothing, it was calming and it was perfect for the couple who would come home after work. I lean further into the couch, making myself comfortable. Ava comes behind me and opens my hair. Ruffling my hair with her fingers and then gently massaging my shoulders, I didn't realize that they needed the treatment before I started feeling comforted, I close my eyes as her hands work magic on my neck and shoulders. She lovingly kisses the top of my head and walks away.

"Whiskey or Vodka?" She asks me.

"Water." I smile at her.

"Yeah okay, but with Whiskey or with Vodka?" She says as if it's so obvious. I glance at the clock hanging on the wall, eight pm it shows. Yeah, obvious for Ava Singhania.