It is a random story that does not make too much sense (I think) and is meant specifically to help set up further adventures in this world and to allow people to laugh.
Best rankings:
#5 Absurd 11/11/2022
#83 Stupid 11/11/2022
#11 Janitor 11/11/2022
Cults are annoying. They end up making a big mess to summon up some random creature from the depths of the abyss which ends up destroying everyone in the cult, leaving a bloody mess and then trying to destroy the world. This is why Splotch hates cults and as a personal side mission, he has made it his goal to destroy any and all cults and I shall now present a small little slideshow experience (using words) of some of Splotches favourite exterminations.
(In a British accent with the can-can dance music in the background) Our first slide shows Splotch happily beating up a small start-up cult using nothing but a random stick he found on the side of the road. Their blood is non-existent due to Splotches knowledge of where blood vessels are and ignoring their locations. Our next slide shows him using a warp key to open up a portal to the depths of hell and sweeping up the bodies into the abyss. (Ahh such nice times)
The third slide shows Splotch poring 5 metric tons of holy water on a random demonic entity that Ahmad just slaughtered the cult that summoned it. The slide after that shows Splotch cleaning up the ritual site and throwing the bodies into the abyss again... next slide presents some of the audio Splotch has from one of his "expeditions" Cultist 1: "ahhhhh, the destroyer is here... Run for your live- *ploosh*"
Splotch: Whoops 😬, accidentally stabbed out his eye. Man my aim is off today. Oh well time to Rip and Tear..
Random demonic entity 1:Hebhaj djdbhd sjehhej? Akamai hendjejs bandshell... ANENSKNDBD DJDDBDJEB DIDNDJIDJ!!!!!! KDK SJSJ AS*screams of the damn boy he thick*
Splotch: Your tentacles are nothing compared to me... Super-Splotch!
UwU sussy thot(random demonic entity 2): Splotch-chan you are so AAAGHHH MY EYESSS
Splotch: No time for woman or man! To much mess be made when dealing with them!
Chaos ensues
More chaos ensues
The screams of the damned
The laughter of Splotch (ke kle kle kle klean)
*audio clik*
Our next slide shows more pictures of Splotch killing cultists through impairment and killing ancient demonic dieties
Whoops looks like Cthulhu doesn't show up well on film so it looks like Splotch was just punching the air for some reason but no he was taking out Cthulhu while Cthulhu was still summoning sick (just imagine this guy one punching Cthulhu back to whence Cthulhu came)
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That is all for todays slide show and remember eat your vegetables so that way the kids in Africa won't starve 😊
