Ready or Not

Chapter 8

After sending Namjoon packing, you find yourself pacing your living room. Clock on your living room wall reads 8:20 PM. You feel restless, as if you are going to jump out of your skin. Not wanting to continue to sit at home and stew about what happened today, you decide to get dressed and head out for a walk. You think, "Maybe the cold night air will clear my head." You dress in your usual relaxed attire, a winter coat and a warm hat and a pair of gloves and head out. It is dark out, but the moon is full, and the streets are quite well lit. The crisp night air makes you feel invigorated. Not sure where you are going, you pick a direction and start walking. About three blocks into your walk, you see in the distance a signage outside the pub that reads, "O'Shaughnessy's Bar and Grille." Feeling a bit hungry and wanting to get in a couple of drinks, you continue your walk towards the sign.

You've been to this pub several times and you like the atmosphere. You walk into the restaurant and go straight to the bar and grab a stool on one end of the bar. It is Monday night, so place is not as busy as you've seen before. There are only handful of people sitting at the bar. You look down the length of the polished wooden counter and see a young woman, maybe in her mid-20s, pretty face, but covered up by a baseball cap, and a man in his mid to late 30s talking on the other end of the bar. The man is broad shouldered and is wearing a tweed sport coat with those charming leather patches sewn on the elbows. Between the couple at the far end of the bar and you, there sits two men that seemed to be engaged in a serious conversation.

You try not to stare too long, but they are both lookers. One is very tall, slim, built like a swimmer. Maybe in his late-20s or early 30s. And the man sitting next to him is shorter and much more muscular with a face like an angel. This one is definitely younger than the tall one, but only by handful of years. Even though you said you wouldn't stare too long, of course, you do, and get caught by the younger of the two men. When he turns to look at you, you are completely mortified. You first avert your gaze and then slowly move your head to face away from them. You think, "Really smooth... You dope."

The bartender finally approaches you and asks, "What can I get for you tonight?"

You ask, "Is the kitchen still open?"

"Yes, the kitchen is open until 10:30 so you have plenty of time."

"Great. I will take a pint of Sam Adams please, and a menu. Thanks."

You decide to take out your phone to check the dating app messages. You have not yet responded back to any one of the countless messages you've received. So, you tell yourself, "Okay, I am going to check out some profiles and possibly reply to some of these messages, if the mood strikes, that is."

The bartender returns with the menu. You look through it quickly and decide on a burger and some fries. You put your order in and earnestly start to look through the messages. Most of them are semi clever one liners to trap some poor unsuspecting woman's attention. But, not you, because you are too smart for that. Then you think, "I am the one who had sex with a man thinking that he was into me, only to find out that I was nothing more than a fuck buddy, and then I let a man use me as a human pillow for a nap. A nap that he needed so that he can fuck some woman all night. Clearly I am not that smart." The bartender brings your beer over and says that the food should be out very soon. As you take a gulp of the beer, you think about the text you saw on Namjoon's phone earlier in your apartment and burn again from shame. You chortle through your nose as you look down at the bottom of your beer glass and just shake your head at yourself. You take another big gulp, put the glass back down and go back to your messages. You start to check out the profile of some of the men and you think, "How many of these are catfishing? I don't think I can do this." You put your phone face down on the bar a little too hard and it makes a loud bang. You jump at the noise that you just made and put your hand over your face to massage your temples. "I'm an idiot." The two men sitting a few stools down from you look over at you.