Daryl's Precious Gem: Iridescent (Daryl Dixon/ Negan Fanfiction)

6: Explanation

"So, all this time I've had an IUD?" My foot lightly tapped the floor as I sat on the edge of the bed.

"Yeah." Negan whispered as he sat next to me.

"Why did you lie to me?"

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"Try me." I glared at him.

Negan rubbed the back of his neck as he sighed, "One day while you were working your dad stopped by looking for you. We ended up chatting for a while. By the time your father left he made a lot of demands and even more threats."

I scoffed, "That's what Paul said you did to them at Hilltop."

Negan shook his head in frustration, "Do you want me to explain or not?"

I bit the inside of my cheek, "What does my father have to do with this?"

"Trevor was never a fan of mine, remember? He threatened to take you in himself and have you sterilized if I didn't!"

"Why would he threaten to do that to his own daughter?" My heart sank. Would my father really do that?

Negan hunched over and put his weight onto his knees. "That's not for me to say, Ruby."

"You owe me an explanation!" I stood and paced the room.

Negan released a frustrated sigh, "Can't you just put yourself in his shoes?" 

I shook my head, "It doesn't make sense! He knew how I felt about kids and starting a family one day!"

"Like I said, it's not for me to say." Negan shrugged.

"Why not tell me this back then?"

"He had to believe that you were actually sterilized! I knew if I had told you that you would just confront him!" Negan raised his voice as he stood to his feet.

"If you would've explained the seriousness of the situation I wouldn't have said anything! Fuck Negan! Do you have any idea what I've been through?!" My mind raced as I thought of Joe and his group that whipped me and potentially did things to me while I was unconscious.

"Then fucking tell me what happened to you out there!"

"I've fought for my god damn life out there! As you know I literally died and miraculously came back." I sniffled. "I've been whipped, tortured, and god knows I was most likely raped!"

Negan's eyes softened as he made his way to me, "Who did it?"

"Doesn't matter.. They're all dead." My lips trembled as the memories flooded me. My arms crossed my chest as I tried to comfort myself.

"Come here." Negan wrapped his arms around me and held my shaking frame against his. As hard as I tried to fight back my sobs and tears I couldn't hold them back. My arms wove around Negan's waist as I held onto him as if my life depended on it.

"I'm here." Negan whispered, gently rubbing my back to soothe me.

"Thank you." I mumbled into his leather jacket. So many emotions crashed over me like a huge wave. I didn't know where to start. Feelings of relief, guilt, hurt, betrayal and appreciation surfaced which confused me. What did it all mean?

Negan's arms moved down my body and lifted me off the floor. He then carried me over to the bed and laid me down. Negan propped himself up on some pillows and allowed me to rest my head on his chest.

So much had happened today! I killed an innocent man, found out I can still have kids and now I laid with the enemy. Guilt poked at me as I felt comforted by Negan. Was I only comforted because he was at one time my safe zone? Or was it because I was desperate for affection? I didn't know the answer. Negan held me close as my eyes slowly shut. The warmth of his body nulled me to sleep.