Nightingale

sixty-two

It's roughly 3 in the morning when we finally make it back to the house,stumbling through the front door as Callie holds it open for Harry, Louis and I. Callie and Louis are going to stay here tonight. Louis and Harry make their way to the couch in the living room, Louis trapping over his feet and landing on the floor making all of us erupt with laughter. I undo the straps of my heels, bracing myself on the wall so I don't dive down head first and smack my head on the hardwood floors as Callie makes her way into the kitchen to get a glass of water for both Harry and Louis.

Once my heels are off and my feet are finally free I take slow steps towards the kitchen and go out through the back door onto the beach. I follow the sand down to the water just as the ocean is pushed up to kiss the beach and cover my feet. The cold pacific ocean water sends a chill up my body but I welcome it due to the heat the alcohol in my system is causing, taking a couple more steps until the water is just below my knees. A deep sigh escapes my lungs, a wave of emotion coming with it like the small waves slowly coming towards me.

I stand in the ocean with a muscle aching smile on my face as tears start falling from my eyes, I look insane but all I feel is relief. "Parker, what the hell are you doing?" Callie calls out from behind me, slightly laughing as she speaks.

I throw my arms up in the arm and throw my head back as a yell back to her, "I'm drunk and standing in the ocean! What does it look like I'm doing?" Callie only laughers more with my response and only 30 seconds go by before I hear the water splash behind me. Next thing I know, Callie is standing next to me with the bottom of her dress hiked up and bunched up in one of her hands.

She wraps her free hand around my shoulders and pulls me closer to her, holding me tight against her side. The tears are still coming down my cheeks but Callie doesn't bring attention to it, she just stands there holding me and resting her head on top of mine staring out into the ocean with me. Her hand resting on my left shoulder slowly rubs gentle circles against the bare skin there in silence, letting me be consumed by the overwhelming feeling of emotion coming over me, which emotion I don't know. What I do know is I feel grateful to have a friend like Callie who, no questions asked, is always there whenever I need her. Sometimes without me even having to say I need someone, she just knows.

"Calloway," I use her full name to get her attention so she knows what I'm about to say isn't one of the drunk love confessions but truly genuine, even though she hates it.

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

"For what?" she giggles slightly at the sudden appreciation.

"For being my friend, a real friend. I haven't had many of those in my life and I don't think you understand how much you mean to me." I bring a hand up to wipe under my nose because snot is starting to run from crying before I continue. "When I left, it was the hardest thing I think I've ever done. I was heartbroken about what I had done not just because of Harry but because of you too. I went to see you because I had to see you one last time, at least I thought it would be the last time, because if I didn't at least say some sort of goodbye to you I would've never forgiven myself. I still haven't forgiven myself if I'm honest."

"You have saved me more times than I can count. I wasn't honest with you about my addiction when we became friends because I was scared you wouldn't look at me the same way, that you would leave me. As messed up as that is it's the truth, you were the first real friend I had ever had and I didn't want to mess that up. You are part of the reason why I was sober for over a year, the longest I had ever been sober. Now I want you to know you are still a reason. I've already put you through losing me once and I promise you I won't put you through that again. At least not because of drugs."