Song:
Blackbird by Noni (Beyond The Lights)I hear Naomi and Todd laughing and talking as they listen to music. I slowly make my way down the stairs and peek to see them in the living room, dancing.
They dance slowly, their foreheads touching. Naomi's eyes are shut as she smiles and Todd pulls back a bit to kiss her forehead.
"I love you." He says.
"I love you." She says back before she presses her lips to his. They kiss for a long time then pull away to stare into each other's eyes.
I've never seen love like they have and it makes me feel happy.
And I wished that one day I will have a love like that.
•••
"You just don't want to try.... No. I tried. But you left. You left because you're a coward just like your father..... You know what? Don't come back. You can get drunk and you can stay at the damn bar. Don't even bother coming back."
It's been a full week. A full week of Todd leaving the house early in the morning and coming back late at night with the stench of alcohol on his breath.
Naomi has been quiet about it and this is the first time I've ever heard her raise her voice.
I hear her slam the phone back onto its hook and then the slam of the bathroom door.
I've never seen her act this way. Todd either. He's never come home drunk before.
I sit on my bedroom floor against the door. I take my cell out and dial his number.
"I heard you." He yells on the other line. "I'm not coming back."
"Todd?" I breathe. "It's me. It's Raina."
"Raina." He says, my name slurring off of his tongue. "Why are you up so late? It's bedtime for you."
I frown. "I'm....I'm not tired." I say quietly as I pick at the carpet. "Can you come home?" I ask. "Please."
"I can't." He says. "You're mother doesn't want me to."
My mother. Naomi.
"Yes she does." I say. "She's just a little angry at you."
"I'm sorry, Raina." He says. "But I'm not coming back."
And then the line goes dead.
I wish Harry were here. I wish he were here with me, standing in this room.
I feel as if I need to hear his voice just to make me forget about all the bad.
Because when he tells me everything will turn out fine... I believe him. It's past midnight and I can't stop thinking.
I thought that coming home to Indiana would help me cope and get myself together but I feel like I'm falling to pieces faster than ever before.
I turn on my side and stare at my bedroom door, wishing to watch Harry walk through. Ever since my conversation with Naomi, I can't stop thinking about him too.
I smile as the memory of our rooftop moments come to mind.
I just want to go back to the city and escape this broken home.
Is it bad that I'm excited to go back to the city after two weeks?
To think just a couple weeks ago I was kind of relieved to leave the city and come back home but then to find out it turned out to be a shitty vacation makes me miss the city even more.
Naomi's doing a bit better than she was last weekend but I'm still worried. I've been with her everyday and every hour, just to make sure she doesn't break down. I haven't seen Todd. The last time I actually saw him was the day I came back and the last time I spoke to him... he said he wasn't coming back.
When he told me that, I felt the flood of familiar emotions rushing back to me.
Two father figures leaving.
"You have everything, right?" Naomi asks as we walk up to the terminal.
"Yes. I checked everything three times." I smile at her.
"It sucks that you're leaving so soon. And on your 21st birthday." She says and I pull her into a hug.
"I'll come back." I say softly as she leans her head on my shoulder. "Maybe you can come visit me sometime."
We pull apart and she's looking at me with a crazy look.
"What?" I laugh. "It'll be fun. The city is amazing."
"Raina, I've never left Indiana in my entire life." She says.
"All the more reason you should come visit the city." I say and she laughs. "Think about it."
A woman's voice announces that my flight is boarding.
"I have to go." I say.
"Wait." She says as she quickly rummages through her bag. She finally pulls out a light blue box with a white satin ribbon tied onto it. "Happy Birthday." She hands it to me.
"Naomi." I say. "I told you not to get me anything." I can't help the smile though.
"I know." She says. "But I wanted to. You don't have anything that'll remind you of me in the city."
I smile at her and hug her tight.
"Open it on the plane. You're going to miss your flight." She laughs. "Call me when you land."
"Okay." I breathe a small laugh as we pull apart. "Thank you."
She smiles. "I love you, Raina."
"I love you." I kiss her cheek and smile at her before I walk towards the line of people waiting to board the plane.
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Sorry it's short.
YOU ARE READING
Black
Roman d'amour"Before I met you I never knew what it was like to look at someone And smile for no reason." {h.s.}