Unrealistic

Epilogue

Epilogue

Phoebe

I stare in silence as Eric posts the blank sheets of paper. He picks up a sharpie to write the first note of respect to me.

Be,

I wish I told you the truth, I wish I told you that I love you.

-Eric

He lets the sharpie rest on the C when he is finished writing, creating a large circular stain on the page. I wonder why he never felt that he could tell me. Perhaps it was for the same reason I felt I could never tell him the same thing.

Through the front doors I see my classmates waiting to come inside. As soon as the doors start to open I see them swarm through me to sign the poster boards lining the table by the office. I feel a tear slip down the center of my cheeks when I read the first few notes.

I'll miss you Phoebe!

You didn't deserve this.

R.I.P. Phoebs!

You might have been the nicest person in our class.

Wish you were still here!

Several people hug Eric and try to ensure him I will be in a better place. This is the first time I think I've ever seen him cry like this, not the trickling weak cry but the read sobbing kind of crying. I decide to stay with him even if he doesn't know I'm here, I'd like to think my presence makes this easier.

The crowd stays fairly chaotic for a few minutes but it soon begins to thin to a handful of people. I look at the three pieces of poster board now covered with notes from my friends, teachers, and some students I don't even remember.

Eventually Eric and I are the only ones left standing before the table of posters.

"I'm sorry I didn't have the guts to tell you. I was going to, really I was, promise. It was supposed to happen this year when I asked you to prom. I was going to give you that necklace my grandmother left to me. You always liked that necklace," he swiped at a tear clumsily.

I sniffle; I had loved that necklace but would never have let him give it to me.

"Then you got sick and I wanted to wait until you got better. Next thing I knew they said you were dying, I couldn't drop something like that on you when we both know it would end before summer was up. Still I wish I could have told you, now I'll never know."

"I love you!" I shout at him. "I've loved you since we met all the way back in kindergarten. Eric hears me, please. I love you!"

I see him lift his head up and for a split second he makes direct eye contact with me. I am almost sure he heard me but before I can be sure a bright white light starts to hover in the middle of the room. It floats closer to me, taking over my vision entirely. Eric is gone, the school is gone, I am gone.

It was never realistic of me to think I could overcome everything so we could be together.