Days are changing, so am I. Every morning,when I wake up, it's different. Different cells, different perspectives, different views. The Sun shines, sometimes, it doesn't. It's changing and never again it's gonna be the same, as it already was.
Today, I've woken up empty. Trying to feel something, at leas my body, the blood in my veins, but nothing has happened. It's just me, covered by blankets not wanting to get up and continue. Day by day, it's harder, but it doesn't mean it's not gonna be awesome one day, but I have to decide today, whether I want to change it, or not.
It's evening, the Moon is strongly shining into the forest and the shadows of trees are making the World look even deeper. And there, there's me, lying in the hammock and hoping for Moon to wake me finally up. The candle is shining a few meters away from me and the quiet spreading through the night is stopped by my favorite German songs being played on my phone. I am doing everything to feel the moment, because it could have been magical. Unfortunately, I am unable to do this. I just keep sitting in the hammock, my sister comes to me and she starts to swing me. I am thinking in metaphors and this act of swinging is for me like my life, It gains the speed, when I am with the correct people. She swings me so fast, that something can easily happen. An accident. But I don't feel the fear. I am not afraid. I am looking to my shoes, I don't feel myself, I don't feel me being present. I am somewhere far far away. I start to slow down, till I finally stop. I am staring to the moon, seeing the shadows of threes all around myself. I feel the Moon touching myself. The touch is cold, soft, but confident. I turn around and I see a girl. She can be about 9 years old and she's looking straight into my eyes. She looks frustrated. Her mouth opens and she says:"I don't know you." I know who she is. it's me. The always happy girl, joking all day long, full of energy, confident, smart, curious,... I see tears in her eyes. She's the Moon. She reminds me of who I used to be. And now, it's that far away that I can only hardly remember it. Everything is back in reality. Except for the fact, that my phone has ran out of power and everywhere is quiet.
It motivates me, that one day, everything is gonna be stable, I am gonna be able to feel and to smile. It's worth my energy but I sometimes forget it. Fight for yourself, it is always worth it.
YOU ARE READING
Me and that's it
Teen FictionHere is, how it's right now, also where it began, and how I hope it would like in the future.
