Cigarettes and Valentines

Chapter 20

Allison's POV

<< Do you know these day where everything just goes by and you don't even really notice it? It's like being present but passively... Kind of like drifting off every once in a while and the attention span is down to a solid zero.

Do you know it? Cause this is completely new to me and it'd be quite helpful to be told what to do about that. >>

________________________

This day was weird.

It was weird, to be back at school after Peter Baker made his confession about the school shooting.

It was weird, answering questions about being in the tutor center when everything happened.

It was weird, being send right back to class after revising the day of the rempage.

It was, in fact, pretty damn weird, since everything happened weeks ago and I actually thought that I was able to repress it instead of digging through my brain in order to find reasons for Peters' actions.

The worst part was, that I couldn't really cope with this day in general.

Michael was two-faced again. Let's be real here, I should've expected it.

On the other hand, he then had no reason to be pissed at me for agreeing on a date with Ashton.

With Ashton! I rested my chin on my hands on the desk in front of me, rarely raising one to give an answer from time to time.

Michael wasn't jealous. Michael didn't bother to even call us friends, let alone lovers.

Lovers wasn't even the right word. I had no idea what we even were - Didn't you have to have sex or at least love each other to be called such?

Michael didn't know love and it confused him, this was easy to tell.

Friends meant having a responsablility of taking care of the other one; being there for one another. This was a feature Michael actually owned deep down in his self-concerned heart.

Michael refused to be a friend towards anyone though? Why? Because it was a responsibility? How did Luke, Calum and Ashton deal with that after all?

If it wasn't jealousy, then what was that threatening sparkle in his eyes in the second where I told Ashton I'd go out with him?

Questions over questions and no answer in sight.

"Miss Parker!" I heard Mr Brown's sympatic voice ring as I stood in front of my locker.

Turning around, I could already see the happiness marked on his face.

"Now now, Miss Parker - what's the one thing that you can't acheive?" He laughed and crossed his arms in front of his chest, watching me shift in my position.

I had no clue where he was coming from and it made me extremely uncomfortable.

"Sir I... I don't..."

He bend his head, watching me play with my fingers which were linked into each other over the books I was pressing against my chest.

"I just wanted to congratulate you as well. Being his tutor, you must be very proud of Michael."

My eyes went wide. "He's through?!" I asked a bit too excitedly and gained a slight laughter from the teacher in front of me as well as some concerned looks from the people passing us in the hallway.

"With flying colours, Miss Parker" Mr. Brown was unprofessionally excited too but he tried to contain his elation at all costs.

"Thank you so much Mr. Brown! You and your wife have done so much for him! I... I know this doesn't mean as much as being told by Michael himself that he's grateful but you know... Michael would never do that even though he really is extremely thankful"