sometimes i'm constantly overthinking
the words that he'd say
and what they might be meaning
i fear his judgment and the weight of his opinions
i worry that he secretly hates me
and that he wants me to go fuck myself
he's this one boy i liked
tall and proud
i was intimidated by him
straight A's, honor student
popular and oh-so kind
who wouldn't fall in love with him?
and that's the thing i hated the most
i romanticized every single interaction
i analyzed his sentences like impossible equations
i dreamt too much, it almost killed me in my sleep
all i wanted was the boy leaning against the handrails
on the staircases of another person's heart
he used to walk me home,
i'd catch up to his brisk pace
for as long as i kept running
i could keep trying to chase the marathon to my dreams
but i slipped and fell on the way
i'm done trying, i'm done decoding our fate
so if he does end up loving me, i'm going for the escape
for him, it'll be too late
because fairy tales only exist in our starlit mindscapes
and i hope the sun shines bright in yours.
YOU ARE READING
starlit mindscapes || poetry
Poetrywe stay still and rot in our beds at midnight, overthinking about the choices we could have done different. we spend too much of our time in our thoughts, paint landscapes with the brush of our brain, and write fairytales with the quill of our eyes...
