Red Rooms I Simon "Ghost" Riley x Reader

26. Scarred

8 AM

You and Ghost both finished 90% of the tiramisu by now, laying in your big bed, watching the sunrise through your massive window. You two talked a lot, well, mainly you. But that was fine, it was nice having a man around for once that actually listens. And Simon is a damn good listener. He would drop some plain questions here & there and also some really good, honest feedback on some things that you couldn't wrap your mind about. You also spent 20 minutes talking about your apartment, telling him how you just moved in 2 months ago and even showing him your pinterest board for interior ideas, telling him about the big carpet you were thinking about getting next.

" 'tis quite cold. Your bedroom floor." he smacks as he slowly drags the tiny spoon out of his mouth, tiramisu melting on his tongue.

"Right? That's why I've been thinking...I just don't know if I should get...the black one or...brown..."

"They have that in beige?" he asks, sounding actually interested

"I...don't know...wait" you scroll to check for other colours. He's sitting up in the bed, blanket covering his legs and you're on your back next to him, with the back of your head resting on his strong shoulder and arm. In this moment, no, this whole situation. You both sharing the tiramisu in bed after 2 amazing rounds of fucking. This felt like heaven to you. This felt like something. You quickly get those thoughts out of your head though. He's military, makes no sense, it doesn't fit, calling all of those thoughts back into your head. Also you've only seen him 2 times now. Chill.

"They don't sell beige", you mutter, closing the tab now and turning around to get another bit of the tiramisu. He watches you closely.

"Brown." he mumbles and you nod.

"I also think so" you say as you return to your position against his arm.

"What do you think of this?" you show him a photo of a XXL neon pink wool blanket.

"Marvellous..." he replies in a low tone. You were just being funny at this point. You put your phone away now and look at him.

He lets out a deep exhausted sigh and puts the small rest of tiramisu onto his nightstand, his hand then moves to his stomach which has the tiniest of bump now.

"That sure was something" he breathes out, looking at the beautiful sunrise. You smile looking at his belly and him holding it. Every small thing this man does, you couldn't stop staring.

"Wanna go for a smoke on the balcony?" you ask.

"Got any cigs on you?" Nodding, you get up and get your bathrobe from the door hanger, heading to your wardrobe to get a guest one for him. As you hold it out to him you figure though, he might be bit too big for that...

He gets up as well and walks towards you with slow, steady steps. If you'd ever saw this figure strut towards you anywhere like that, you'd probably pee your pants.

Taking the bathrobe you offer him, he analyzes it. As he puts it on, it does fit, only that he can't really knot it in the front, since his back is bit too broad.

"That'll do" he mutters, following you onto your balcony. It was chilly in the morning air, but not too bad. You both sit down surrounded by your plants. He takes one of your cigarettes and lights it, then offers the flame to you. You light your smoke on that and lean back, inhaling, exhaling. It was a quiet morning.

"Where will you be going on Tuesday?" you ask quietly

"Can't tell." Yeah...You guessed so already. But it was worth the try.

"And...Yeah..okay" you mumble, turning sad now thinking too much about him being gone for an uncertain amount of time or worst case: Forever.

A thick silence grows between the two of you.

You just got used to that happening since he is the way it is, but this one was uncomfortable. Unbearable, even. Not after the night you two just had together.

You wish he would say something. Something to get you out of your racing thoughts. He stays quiet though, taking a drag and exhaling the smoke, eyes focused on the sky.

His stubble was a light shade of brown, his jaw defined with a big scar crossing the jawline. His lips had a frown to them, always. It's like he was born this way, the corners of his mouth slightly facing downwards.

You wish you could see more.

"Is this it, Simon?"

He looks startled, side-eyeing you now with the cigarette between his lips, as he fixes his bathrobe a bit since it's getting chilly.

"Is what what..." he grunts

You roll your eyes a bit.

"I don't know how you're feeling but I really had one of...no, I can honestly call it the... best night I've had in months. That just does not happen like that. And...If you're gonna leave for an unknown amount of time to an unknown location, maybe even ... yeah... I would like to just know, so that I don't have to you know...fucking...worry...and shit..." you suddenly feel so embarrassed. What the fuck did you expect from him? To be like Oh yeah sure stranger let's call my captain and actually tell him sorry I had a good fuck last nite I'm quitting?...You want to sink into the floor right now.

"You think I won't be back?" he replies, eyes staring back towards the skyline

"I mean...Is it not...like super dangerous?!"

He scoffs, turning off his cigarette in the ashtray.

"Military? Bits..." he says dryly.

You really couldn't with his humour right now. You felt like crying at the thought of him gone, really.

"I mean it Simon, I saw your scar." He rubs the top of his head, pulling down his mask with his free hand now.

"Got plenty of 'em, gotta be more precise, Pearl."

"The one on your fucking heart---"

Okay. Goodbye. This was too much. You're doing too much. Who do you think you are? His mom? His girlfriend? You were making a fool of yourself!

He does not reply to that. He indeed has plenty of scars, he has lost track. Only two of those nearly costing him his life.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't...even...Forget it, Simon." you shakily turn out your cigarette as you enter the apartment again, holding back some incoming tears but failing terribly.

This time, he couldn't comfort you the way he did last night. Now it was him being left alone on your balcony, sitting with his trauma.