Part 30 - Pawn

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Something strange came over Lo'ak once Fay'tari had said that. It didn't show up on his physical appearance however his head began to pick at her words.

He'd just discovered her driving force; Her reason for trying so hard and needing to win so bad. He thought it was simply the same as his: That she didn't want to become his mate so she had to find any way to get around it. But, it wasn't because of him at all. It was because she felt controlled. Fay'tari didn't want her Mother's plan to follow through, telling him that she'd practically sold her own daughter off without her permission, he assumed.

So it's not because she doesn't want to be with me? He asked himself variations of the same question.

All of those thoughts had to be pushed to one side when he snapped back into reality and realised Fay'tari was still visibly upset in front of him. Although, he then decided a joke would be of help, choosing a rather pointed and unnecessarily provoking one.

"So you'd be open to being my mate if it wasn't for her?" He started to smile, preparing to laugh once she had, however she never did. She believed him to be deadly serious. All movement on her face stopped as well as the rest of her body, her eyes widening at him, looking like they were almost judging him.

When he saw her reaction, he stepped in. "Oh- I was joking, I'm joking..." Lo'ak explained, hyperventilating due to the fear of ruining their extremely civil interaction.

She relaxed after that, observing his rather flustered features before touching his hand, moving along every finger until she reached his smallest one. She saw him move in front of her, which she knew was because she was acknowledging his hands that he so hated.

"I think I'd be okay with it." Fay'tari murmured, only looking at his hands. When she received no words back, she directed her gaze upwards, finding Lo'ak pulling the exact same face she'd just pulled moments ago. She grinned, squeezing his hand tighter, saying "I'm joking..." as her smile grew. He waited a moment before laughing in relief, she assumed.

A rapid shiver took over the girl's body, causing her to make an odd quivering noise as she shook. Almost laughing at her but choosing life, he readjusted his positioning, moving his head so that it lay closer to hers, his other hand joining the already held one. As he moved closer, so did the hands, allowing them to rest slightly on his chest.

Her curiosity pricked once contact had been made to the boy's chest, her eyes crossing between him and her own hands a few times. A small leer showed itself, before she couldn't help asking about it.

"Your heart's beating fast, you know?" She stared at him, waiting for him to look at her weirdly in response to her bold comment. In it's place however, was a completely unbothered reciprocated stare. He observed her there, noticing her eyes that were failing to leave his, her nose that looked cold, her ears that were twitching every so often, her stilled lips that were slightly agape because of how lost in thought she was.

This time, it was different. They'd looked at each other plenty of times before, but never in the way they were then. And they knew that.

It was like poison, gradually killing them.

Lo'ak's stare stayed upon the girl's lips, only redirecting back to her eyes when he wanted to check she was still looking at him. He began to unhurriedly lean his head in further, his eyes growing thinner as he did so. His stare left her eyes for too long that time, as he'd leaned so close to her that if he looked up towards her, his vision would be blurred due to its proximity. He closed his eyes, going in...

...Before he was met with two shivering hands covering his own mouth. He instantly opened his eyes, confused but moreover disappointed. He saw her still staring, but with a wavering expression. Fay'tari looked at him with worry and guilt, slight fear but also disappointment to match his feelings. Her brows had curled upwards in the front corners, her lips pushed together a little more than usual and her ears had been tucked back once again. All she did thereafter was shake her head, a sorry look taking over.

It was as if a thousand words were being passed over between the two of them. They both knew what she meant, not needing to nor wanting to hear the words spoken out loud. Maybe out of embarrassment, sure. But mainly because of a sharp tug they'd both feel inside their chests anytime the thought would come to them.

Fay'tari wasn't stopping him out of fear of what he might do. She'd stopped him because she knew everything would become too difficult if she let him.

Instead of pushing her away or getting at all mad at her, Lo'ak gently moved the arm that was directly on the hammock behind the girl's head, signalling for her to raise for a second so that he could move it further. When she understood, she allowed him to lower his arm right the way down to her waist, using the both of them then to bring her in closer. She released her hands from him, clasping them together as she rested her head on his arm. He pulled her into a tight hug, allowing her to rest on his chest as well as dig her head into his neck as she lay sideways. She took her own free arm, wrapping it around Lo'ak too.

Due to their closeness, their legs had to intertwine with each other, both of them feeling unexpectedly comfortable.

Fay'tari could feel the boy's heart where she lay, not finding it as funny as the last time. Instead, she liked the sound of it. It made her feel sleepy, the sound of his slowed breathing not helping in keeping her awake.

Before she could fully doze off, Lo'ak had hugged even tighter; His arms tensed their grip, solidifying his embrace by placing his hands onto her skin too, as before they'd been lying lifeless. She felt him curl his legs up tighter, as if he were holding on for dear life.

Rather concerned, she muttered his name. "Lo'ak?" She lifted her head a little, though there was no way she'd be able to see his face. "What's wrong?" She whispered, beginning to caress his back with her own arm in an attempt to soothe him.

He hitched his breath.

"I probably won't be able to do this again, so..." He spoke quietly and with truth. She could tell he wasn't joking around. "Let me. Please." He begged, though there wasn't any need for it.

Fay'tari directed her hand up towards the back of his head, clasping it and brushing his nape up and down. She smiled as she felt him do the same along her back, allowing her to feel an overbearing sense of peace weigh down on her.

She'd never done that before. Hug anyone, that is. Of course, when she was too young to make the memories stick, she'd probably hug her parents a lot more, however the girl couldn't consciously remember ever willingly embracing anyone.

The girl nestled in some more, sighing deeply before finally answering him.

She breathed, "...Okay." 

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