Changed Me ( Rewritten)

23

The front door opens suddenly, startling him a bit. Max gently rubs his arm, as if to help him calm down. " Nat " he hears NuNew quickly say before rushing towards him. When he turns to look, he can see NuNew, Zee and Poppy all looking towards him worriedly.

He bites his lip before looking down. " What ha- " NuNew starts to say but quickly stops. NuNew walks off to the side of them. " Why is there a knife right here " NuNew asks concerned. " I-I " he stutters. " When I found him, he was about to cut up this painting with the knife " Max says.

He gets off of Max's lap before slowly standing up. " Nat, this is " NuNew says quietly. " I know. I wasn't thinking right. I just " he says, avoiding eye contact. He can already feel himself starting to cry again. Max stands up and wraps his arm around him comfortingly.

" I just wanted the suffering to stop. I thought ". He finds it incredibly difficult to admit what he was thinking. " I was thinking about everything and then I started to think about how this past year has been nothing but a constant struggle. Besides dating P'Max and becoming friends with P'Zee and P'Poppy, this past year has been nothing but me suffering " he says quietly.

" But why were you trying to destroy this painting " Zee gently asks. " I wanted to find the reason. What the caused everything to start going downhill. I-I looked all over my room " he says quietly. " You thought about this painting. You thought this painting caused all of your suffering " NuNew says.

" All of my art. I thought it all caused it. This painting was just the main one " he says quietly. " Nat " he hear NuNew say before rushing off towards his room. It's only then that he looks back up. " Did you do something to your room Nat " Poppy asks gently. He nods his head before starting to walk towards his room.

When he reaches his room, he finds NuNew looking through the mess. He can hear Zee quietly gasps in shock at the sight of his room. " Baby ", Max says concerned. He doesn't reply, instead he starts to slowly pick up everything. " You were so proud of all your artworks. But you tear them down " NuNew says.

            " I thought that if I got rid of the cause. Then it will get better. That I'll stop suffering " he says quietly before picking up one of the drawings. It's a drawing he did of his father. He was going to easily get rid of this drawing. His thoughts were so messed up and he wasn't thinking straight. He almost ruined this drawing.

            " I don't know why my immediate reaction was to destroy all of my art. Maybe because I was desperate for things to get better. Or I wanted to prevent anymore bad things from happening " he says quietly. " I'm glad that Max came here and helped you " Poppy says. " Me as well " he quietly replies.

They all help him clean up his room. They set painting in one stack. While placing all of his drawings and art supplies on his desk. By the time they are done cleaning the mess up, it's 9:00pm. " I'm sorry guys. That you had to help me clean up " he says quietly. As they all sit down on the floor in his room.

" Don't be. I'm glad we are all here to help you. So you don't have to go through this alone " Zee says with a gentle smile. " I just want to be ok. But it's like I just randomly start to think about everything and end up panicking for some reason like I did " he says, leaning into Max's side.

He wraps his arms around one of Max's arms. He doesn't know why, but it brings him comfort to do this. " Your mind doesn't know how to react. You've had a lot of bad things happen recently and you're unable to truly process it all. So you switch to one emotion as a way to try and process it. In your case, you chose panic and fear " Poppy says.

" I must have scared P'Max a lot. I don't even know when he showed up. But I'm glad you did P'Max " he says quietly. " I was worried about your safety. You were clearly struggling and had a knife in your hand. So I immediately tried to get the knife away from you. As fast as I could " Max says.

            " I like that you all are here to help me through things like this. I feel like, even though I might get upset and panic through it. You will all be there in the end to help me calm down " he admits quietly. " What happened " he hears his mother ask. So he quickly turns towards the door to see her.

            " How was work " he asks her. " It was ok. But something happened. What's wrong " his mother asks as she comes into the room, sitting on the ground with all of them. " I had a really bad breakdown. But luckily P'Max came and stopped me before I " he pauses. " before I cut up the painting that dad loved " he admits quietly.

            " Why were you going to do it " she asks him gently. He nervously grabs ahold of Max's hand as he avoids eye contact. " I just ended up thinking about this past year and how it's been nothing but a complete struggle. I wanted to find a reason and get rid of it. So I can stop my suffering ".

            " I thought about what the caused everything to start going downhill. I ended up coming to the conclusion that it was my art that caused it. And I don't know why. But my immediate reaction was to destroy all of my art. M-My room was a mess but we all cleaned it up ". He takes a deep breath.

            " It's times like these. That I wish I knew how to help you like your father could " his mother says quietly. He looks up at his mother. Only to see her smiling sadly at him. " But I'm glad they all can help you like he could " she says. He shakes his head no quickly.

            " No one can do it like he could. Everyone can help me calm down. It's different for each person. You help comfort me and calm me down by being my mom and taking care of me. By hugging me whenever I need it " he says quietly. She smiles at him gently.

            " Dad had a special way of talking. He seemed to always know what I was thinking and what I needed to hear. Anytime I needed advice or help calming down. I knew I could talk to him because he always knew how to help me " he says, smiling sadly.

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