A Red Rose - Hyunlix

29

Felix's POV

-S-sorry- I said softly, in a desperate whisper.

I felt empty, as if the tears had taken away all the pain. Hyunjin stood up and held out his hand to invite me to get up and I looked into his eyes.

-Felix, it's normal to fall. The important thing is to get up again- he said, smiling at me and I sniffed at him. I took his hand and stood up, holding on to the physical contact.

-Why did you lie to me?- He asked, my eyes widening, hoping he wasn't referring to Changbin.

-W-What are you talking about?-

-I know you went out with Changbin, it read from the body language that you were lying- he said, looking at me reproachfully.

I looked at the ground, running out of words.

-Did your cat cut out its tongue? I'm right?- I nodded, engulfed in a tremendous sense of guilt. He took my hand and led me to the couch, where he sat a foot away from me, scanning his body with his dark eyes.

-Did he do something to you?- He asked directly.

-N-no, we talked and drank hot chocolate.-

-Why did you have the urge to go to the bathroom?- he asked, referring to when I threw up.

-I mistakenly thought about all the calories e, and that I might get f-fat- I said, dragging the last word until it faded.

-Felix, you are perfect. Besides, a hot chocolate at this age doesn't even touch you.- he said, taking my hand and stroking it.

-Will you make me a promise? He asked, his eyes filled with hope and I nodded, to see that gleam again in his eyes.

-Promise me that if you ever feel the urge to take laxatives or induce vomiting or hurt yourself in any other way, you'll come to me and you'll commit to checking your head- he said, with a shy smile.

-What you see is all the result of your head- he continued, pressing his forefinger on my forehead to reinforce his words.

-Promise?-

He asked, handing me his little finger and I stared at him for a long time, trying to think.

Would I be able to fulfill the promise? To take care of my body without making it suffer from hunger, eat and not vomit...For Hyunjin, I kept repeating in my mind, fixing my eyes on the hand extended towards me, like a handhold that would lift me out of the darkness.

He withdrew his hand, but I stopped him in time, grabbing his wrist and entwining my little finger with him.

-I-I promise- I proclaimed.

He smiled and pounced on me, hugging me and dropping me onto the couch, crushed by his weight

-Thank you- he whispered in my ear, while I blushed, for the position we had assumed.

He leaned his elbows on the fabric of the sofa, trying to unload its weight, looking into mine. I felt my cheeks inflame, in coordination with my heart pumping blood at very high speeds. I felt goosebumps and electric shocks everywhere, was it him?

He moved his gaze to my lips and a moment later to my eyes, repeating this movement of pupils for a few times. She licked the edges of his lips and I felt my heart burst under him, butterflies in my stomach and thoughts escaping me, as if his presence could rob me of logic. He jumped up, getting back on his feet and helping me up, even though I couldn't think of anything else except when he licked his lips looking at mine and I felt totally on fire.

-Good, now remember to keep your promise- he said as if nothing had happened

-Come, I'll make you a snack- he said, going to the kitchen. I stood there paralyzed, still processing what had happened. Had he really pretended nothing happened? I too wanted to learn that indifference that my heart just couldn't create. After about ten seconds I joined Hyunjin in the kitchen while he prepared me a red pomelo.

-Can you eat?- he asked, sitting next to me.

-I-I don't know- I said, it was all a test. Would my mind be able to hold on? I took a wedge of the red fruit and took a bite. I felt the juice drive my taste buds crazy and I swallowed slowly.

-Breathe slowly- he said, wrapping his arm around my back until I felt his hand squeeze my waist from the opposite side. And I couldn't breathe with him holding me. I felt every muscle under the influence of butterflies in my stomach and shivers, a paralysis that only he could unlock.

-Hyunjin- I said, out of breath.

-Tell me-

-I can't breathe if you hold me like this- I said, looking at the fruit on my plate.

-How?- He said naively

-Your hand- I said, taking small breaths.

-Oh, sorry- he said pulling his hand away and I breathed again. I relaxed back in my chair and closed my eyes. I felt his hand resting on my cheek and forcing me to open my eyes and look at him.

 -If you don't eat it all, I won't stop touching you- he said, stroking my cheek and looking at me with a languid look. The heart hadpeak and my cheeks turned red as I stared back at her in fear. On the one hand her touch was insanely beautiful and I longed for it with all my heart the way he touched me so softly but on the other hand I couldn't take it. It was devastating, it sucked all my strength, my heart was racing, I lost logic and felt those damn butterflies in my stomach and it was as beautiful as it was tiring.

And I didn't know what to do. I wanted his touch badly...He moved his hand slowly until it reached the neck and then the nape of the neck, grabbing me and forcing me to bring his face closer to him. And now I was back to not breathing, with our faces barely a few inches apart.

I looked at him as he scanned my face with inspection.

-Do you like it when I touch you, Felix?- he pronounced my name like a spell and how I wanted to kiss him, those lips so compact and full...I cursed myself for my own thoughts and for where they were going.

He looked me intently into his eyes, with his cursed seductive gaze that knew how to melt me like an icicle in the sun. He brought his mouth to my ear until his cheek collided with mine.

-If you want, I can touch you very well- he whispered to me and my heart pumped adrenaline until my nearby organs burst. I moved away and began to eat the pomelo as if I was exaggeratedly hungry, also because if I hadn't eaten it I would have been afraid of the consequences. He scoffed, knowing me too well to know which keys were broken.