OLYMPIA ▷ KYLO REN

xxi.

Kylo Ren didn't know how to feel.

He hadn't let anyone so close to him since he was a teenage boy. Astraea had visited him every day since he woke from his coma. She didn't always speak to him, sometimes they just sat together reading.

Killing his father had opened up a whole new rift of pain and confusion in him and having Astraea there dulled that pain a little. She didn't force him to talk, she just listened. He wasn't able to tell her much but whatever he did tell her, she listened without judgement.

Her gentleness made him feel like everything would be okay. She made him feel the most at peace he had ever been since he was a child.
He was finally able to return to his own quarters now, he couldn't wait to lie in his own bed, rather than the uncomfortable one in the hospital.

He now sat with Astraea in his quarters, her sitting next to him on the end of the bed. He hated the nurses that came in to change his bandages- their consciences were always so heavy with fear- so he asked Astraea if she would do it.

She laughed when he asked and made fun of him for being 'scared' of the nurses but she agreed nonetheless.

"I don't think you need bandages anymore. Your wounds have sealed up."Astraea smiled as she scanned his bare torso. He watched as she squinted at the other scars on his chest, flinching below her touch when she swiped her finger across a round white scar on his collarbone. "Where did you get this one?" She asked, tracing it's circular line with a soft finger.

His skin burned below her touch, yearning for more.

"Blaster shot." He replied, watching her delicate fingers dance over his scars. They had gotten much closer over the last few weeks and she had to touch him often to change his bandages, so he should have been used to her touch but it still made shivers shoot up his spine.

She hummed in response, removing her touch.

He watched her with wanting eyes as she stood from his side and walked to the window of his room. His room on the Finalizer was nowhere as nice as the one on Starkiller but he had to make do.

She stared out into the void of space, stars reflecting in her eyes. She lifted her palm and placed it on the window, a small smile on her lips.

"Since we don't have another attack planned for quite some time due to the loss of Starkiller, do you think I could return to Olympia for some time?" Astraea asked, her hand falling from the window.

His heart dropped. She wanted to leave him? He swallowed slowly.

"If that is what you wish." He spoke lowly, he didn't want her to go. Astraea turned to look at him, walking towards the chair close by and flopping into it. "Why?" He added.

"I miss home." She answered, a sad look on her face. She looked back to him again, a small smile growing on her lips. "Would you come with me, if I asked you to?" She asked..

He paused for a moment. She wanted him to come with her to her Olympia.

"You are in no state to return to duties. If the First Order want their apprentice back in full health, they'll grant you some time off." She added, crossing her legs.

He stated for a moment, he wanted nothing more. He had spent so much time avoiding her and pushing her out of his mind that now he was exhausted- now he didn't even try to block her out.

"You're not wrong. I think I would, if you did ask me to join you on Olympia." A light smirk played on his lips, he wanted to hear it from her own.

His stomach burned as she rolled her eyes, an eyebrow raised. She returned a playful glare, leaning her elbow on the armrest to prop up her chin. She was absolutely ethereal in his eyes. He couldn't bury his attraction to her any longer.

She sighed softly. "Would you like join me on Olympia?" Astraea drawled, her ocean eyes boring into his. He couldn't stop the smirk that continued to play on his lips, a simple 'yes' leaving his lips.

Astraea smiled, standing from the chair. "I'll speak to Hux. You should do the same." Her heels clicked as she inched towards the door. His heart throbbed at the sight of her frame in the form-fitting blue and white dress she wore, he wanted nothing more than to run his hands over it.

He nodded to her as she quietly left the room, the warmth of her presence disappearing slowly.

He looked out towards the window like Astraea had minutes ago, lost in his mind. He wasn't even trying to censor his thoughts. Snoke would find this weakness of his soon.

He didn't think of Astraea as a weakness, though. She made him feel stronger. The light did call to him more and he tried not to covet it but it was so addicting.

He knew he could be strong and ruthless like he had been trained to be and that could coexist with his deep feelings for Astraea. He had been feeling this pull to her since he met her.

Perhaps the thing he found most attractive was that she didn't need him. She didn't need him to protect her or speak for her and yet, she chose to spend her time with him. She didn't seem to spend time with him to use him.

He could sense that she had complicated feelings for him to, wether they fell into the same box as his, he wouldn't know unless he asked her.

He glanced over to the transmission device next to his bed, grunting as he reached over to lift it. He would inform Hux that he was going now, so he didn't have to spend a moment outside of her vicinity.