Even if the sky is falling down - A Volodymyr Zelenskyy fanfiction

Chapter 14 - Whatever it takes

Although I was doubting, I couldn't unsee the fact that I miss him. It became normal for me to sleep beside him in his bed. Another thing that clearly was and is dangerous. Although I always try not to attract attention while going into his room, somebody must have noticed that it happens regularly.

I need to talk about that with Piotr, one of my few friends within Volodymyr's team and one of the guards who is responsible for the president's personal security. He always has an eye on him. But he didn't travel with Volodymyr to central Europe 'cause he didn't feel well in the days before, so Volodymyr decided to go without Piotr. Perfect opportunity for me to see and talk to him.

I slightly knock on his door. "Come in, please", I can hear Piotr saying. I step in his room, seeing him resting in his bed. "Am I disturbing you?", I ask him. "You could never", he answers me, smiling. I walk towards him and take place at the edge of his bed. 

"What did you do to make him so mad about you before leaving? One could hear him shout through the whole bunker", Piotr starts our talk. "The drafts for his speeches he will hold in front of the parliaments were in fact bullshit", I answer honestly. "Why that? You used to do your job quite well as far as I'm informed", Piotr says. 

I don't know how much I should tell him. He doesn't seem to know much about me and Volodymyr yet. Would he keep it a secret? "Didn't you notice me walking into Volodymyr's private room regularly?", I start. "For sure, I did. Should I worry about that?", Piotr responds. "Can I tell you a secret?", I ask instead. "Always, you know. I will never forget that you are the reason that I have this job. Being a bouncer never fits me and this is what I always was looking for. So, what's your secret?", he says. "We -", I search for the right description, "have sex", I finally say. Again, I realize, it is all in all not really more than that.

"I'm not surprised to hear that", Piotr tells me. "Haha", I respond. "No, really. I mean, he always had an eye on you. It was kind of obvious that you and him would end up like this together", he explains. Oh damn it, everyone was interpreting it right, except of me. "At least, it's good for him to... reduce some stress, you know", Piotr continues. I roll my eyes. "So you don't think it will be a problem?", I ask him. "Not for us down here. But it shouldn't become official. Would throw a false light on him. That he has time for these things and so on", he concludes. "Yeah, you're right. Thank you. Get well, soon", I say, leaving him.

After this talk, I feel better regarding my relationship with Volodymyr, but my doubts aren't killed yet. I need to understand that the war is priority one, although I whish it would be me. That will be a challenge. Especially with the feelings, sensations and desires being so fresh. I should be satisfied with smaller things. He is not the man he was before the war, all in all. He aged, don't have the patience and jauntiness as before and the main thing, not the time. I should become the one giving, not taking, expecting, but letting him lead, as he demanded. If we make this clear, we might stop losing. 

Finally, it is time to follow one of his speeches in TV. I switch it on. As soon as he starts to speak, I get caught by him, as always. The way he uses his passion to lead through the speech is amazing. It gives the words he says so much more meaning. 

In one of the following press conferences, a journalist asks him how he formulate these amazing speeches and tells him that they are historical. His answer makes me blink, as tiredness sets in. "I formulate these speeches together with my amazing speech-editor, Anna Meyer. I bring up some ideas and she creates a narrative using them. It's in fact her work and I'm thankful having her." 

"In every way", he concludes, looking right into the camera. "How do you mean?", another journalist shouts from the back rows. I thought, Volodymyr would ignore it, because he already said too much, but he takes the question. "I mean that she is the hold I need in these days. We work together since the beginning of my presidency and she was always there, at my highs and lows. And she is there, now, when I need someone the most", he says. "Yeah, Mr. President, thank you, I think, we should leave it here", a member of our media team intervenes. But Volodymyr doesn't move away from that mic. "I love her. She is my girlfriend", he manages to say before he is pushed aside. The press conference is closed. The scandal is there.

I need some moments to realize. What was he thinking? This is the end of his presidency. Found food for Putin. A weakening for our country. 

It knocks at my door. I open my eyes. The TV is in stand-by-mode. I must have been fallen asleep while watching the press conference and dreaming, hopefully. I let the person enter. It's Piotr. "Did he...", I am afraid to ask. "Did he reveal our relationship officially?", I ask him. Piotr starts to laugh. Okay, he didn't. I sigh. "He was calling you right after the press conference but you didn't respond", he explains. "He wanted me to ask you calling him back. You had a wild dream, didn't you?", Piotr says, giggling. "Thank you. Yes, I think, I go beserk", I tell him. 

After Piotr is gone, I take some time to calm down before calling Volodymyr. I take a cold shower and scold myself. I should definitely think less about all this.

I finally call Volodymyr. "Hey, did you follow the speech? It was amazing. The applause I got! Did you see?", he asks me, caught in emotions. "Yes, I did. You've made an amazing job, as always", I say. "We both did a great job. You, too. Late, but finally. I wanted to say sorry. I shouldn't have expected that you can deal with my and your feelings in a professional way. Under normal circumstances, you wouldn't have to. I overwhelmed you with that and put you in a new situation, additionally to the war. But I promise, as much as I will fight to win this war, I will fight to rock this relationship. Whatever it takes", he concludes. I can't help, but smile. He's ready to give everything to make this work. So am I.