Even if the sky is falling down - A Volodymyr Zelenskyy fanfiction

Chapter 19 - We will face that

Volodymyr treats me with much more caution since he knows that I'm pregnant. He does not allocate as much workload to me as he did before and does his best to avoid stressful situations for me. He also takes more attention of what we both eat over the day, what has the positive side effect that he also nourishes himself healthier. And he is way happier since he knows. I observe him smiling more often and taking things with more ease again.

I'm happy that my pregnancy has these effects on him, but I also wonder how he manages to not worry. We haven't officially informed anybody yet, either about our relationship, nor about my pregnancy. This is the main thing I worry about. I don't know if he has plans for that. It would be better because I don't have. It's at least on him to decide who should know and who not.

But I also worry about the nearer future with the baby. Where should I give birth? In the main hospital in Kyiv? Or better abroad, maybe in Germany, from where I come from? But I want Volodymyr's baby to be Ukrainian, so I need to give birth here in Ukraine, although I worry about the security risks.

Can Volodymyr be by my side when giving birth? Is he even allowed to? And the more important question, will he manage to take time? Imagine, the baby wants to come to this world when Volodymyr is holding a state reception... What will he say to the visitor, maybe an important political leader? 'Sorry, I do want your support for my country, but right now, I don't have time anymore 'cause I'm going to be a father?'

Afterwards, I need to stay with the baby at home for the first time. Is it safe enough at my private apartment? It's in Kyiv, okay, but also there one cannot be safe. When do I return to my job? I don't want Volodymyr to look for another speech-editor. I love my job and I love working with him. In the first time, I can do it from home, that's not the problem. But to which extent can I work, especially in the first time with the baby?

Additionally, there are the "normal" worries a becoming mother has, especially if it's her first baby. Is the baby healthy? How will I get through the pregnancy? Should I fear giving birth? Will I be a good mother?

All this concerns me. There hasn't been the opportunity to tell Volodymyr or to talk with him about everything coming in general. During the past days, he was busy, as usual. He indeed spends his nights again by my side, but when he joines me, it is always after midnight and I already sleep. I do sleep better since he is with me again. His presence calms me down and has positive effects on my psyche. Sadly, this does not affect my nausea which usually hits me in the early morning, when Volodymyr is already up, so he doesn't notice it most of the time. I'm at least thankful for that because I don't want him to feel the need to stay longer with me and to start working later as a result.

The week passes by, and I postpone the plan to talk to him about my concerns. At Saturday evening, I spend some time in Volodymyr's room, preparing a speech with which Volodymyr will address some soldiers that are expected to return from Russian captivity at Monday. I am so concentrated on finding the right words for these heroes that I don't notice Volodymyr entering. As a result, I wince as he puts his hands on my shoulders. "Sorry darling, I don't mind to scare you", he says. "What are you working on?", he then asks. "I prepare your speech for the soldiers that return home the day after tomorrow", I say. "Do you think you'll finish that within 20 minutes? I have a surprise for you then", Volodymyr says. "Give me 30 minutes and I'll be pleased with it", I answer. "And I also have a gift for you", I add. He gently caresses my shoulders before he leaves the room.

I finished the address five minutes before he returns. I sit over on the bed, awaiting him. He comes back with a little package in his hands. He smiles when he comes over and sits besides me on the bed. He hands the package over to me. "Open it", he just says. I follow and unpack the little gift. When I removed the wrapping paper, I hold little baby socks in my hands. I can't help but smile. I lean over and kiss Volodymyr. "I wanted to tell you that I'm feeling way better since I know that you care my baby inside. I know, it won't be easy at all, but I promise that I'll do my best to protect both of you and to let us live such a normal family-life as it is possible in our situation. From now on, I'll always put you two first", he concludes. "Thank you, for all", I say. "I was not sure how you would react when I tell you about the baby. I need you to know that I didn't provoke to get pregnant. I always took my birth control pills. I never – " "It doesn't matter, at all", he interrupts me. "But it is important for me that you know that I didn't betray you", I say. "I know", he says. "I always wanted to have a family. I always wanted to have you. Now, I'll have it both. The war outside won't take this away from me", he says. I smile. This is such a strong interpretation of our nonetheless complicated situation.