After all these years

Chapter thiry- three

A light weight lifted off my chest as I opened my eyes for the first time, in what feels like forever.

I suddenly see my Ezra asleep on the chair next to me.

I sat up a little bit beginning to look around, seeing a nurse.

"Excuse me?"

"Ah you're awake." She smiled walking in.

"Yes, how long was I out?"

"You've been out for two, almost three weeks."

"Woah, that's it? Feels like months, maybe even years."

"Yeah that's common. I advise you to take it easy. Don't make any fast, sudden movements."

"Okay." I whispered as she closed the door behind her.

Looking around the room I saw flowers, gifts, 'get well soon' cards and a smile took up my whole face.

"Ezra?" I whispered in the lowest tone possible.

I want to wake him up, but I don't.

"Ezra?" I said a little bit louder.

Suddenly his body shifted towards me, and his eyes fluttered open.

"Aria? Is that really you?" He ran over to me grabbing my hand.

"Yeah of course." I laughed lightly.

"I just want to hold you and never, ever let you go."

"Do it." I said moving over.

He crawled into bed with me, holding my side.

"I missed you." He rubbed my baby bump.

"It was only two weeks."

"Yeah, the worst two weeks of my life." I said as my face dropped.

I caused him pain. I cause the man I love and my family pain and heart-ache. It was all my fault. I didn't eat for days, to cause myself pain. It only hurt the people around me.

"I feel horrible." I muttered to myself.

"Oh, honey. No, please don't, this wasn't your fault." He tried to reassure me.

"Yes it was, I didn't eat for days, causing me to faint and I hit my head and got a concussion and woke up from and coma two weeks later. I put you through hell. I'm sorry"

"Baby girl..."

"You see this?" He asked pointing to my stomach as I nodded.

"There's a baby in there. A baby we made Aria."

"Okay... I know?" I asked wondering where he's going with that.

"I know you feel useless and you're a bad mother and stuff like that. But guess what? You're not useless. You and I made that baby. You're carrying a human inside of you. I think that's something to think about whenever you want to hurt yourself. You need to eat more because you're feeding for two. The baby could have died." He started crying.

"...you could've died."

My heart dropped as I realized what I have done.

"Lucky enough, she's fine and healthy right now. Please? Aria, do this for me."

"She?"

"That's just a guess, she feels like a she.. I wouldn't mind another girl, as long as she's like her mother." Ezra smiled.

"And another thing..." He sat up straighter.

"..."I love you, Aria. You. Just the way you are. You're a great mother you do not need to take it out on your wrists or any part of your body.The ring I gave you isn't a regular piece of jewelry it's the symbol of our love.
I need you to know you are enough. You aren't perfect, but you are the closest thing to it. You're amazing and I know you have days where you feel like you aren't but you have me. I need you to not over think, it will lead to bad things. I need you to talk to me instead of bottling up your emotions. Most of all I need you to know that I love you and I will never stop loving you no matter what." Ezra said looking up into my eyes.

"I love you." I replied.

"...so, so, so, so much. I am so sorry."

"It's alright." He said kissing my forehead.