Trust me..

Chapter 7 🤍🤍

It's the end of the day. Thank god

While I'm leaving school I can see people starting at me and I hate it. I practically run home. At lease I get to spend the night with josh like I used to.

My dad is out for the night so we are home alone.

"Joshhhhh" I shout.

He comes down the stairs and looks at me.

"Why are you looking at me like that" I say.

" I have to cancel on tonight" he said.

"..why" I say. I'm very mad and if this is not a good reason I'm gonna kill him.

"I may or may not... have a...date.." he says nervously.

"OMG WHAT WHO WHEN WHAT!! THIS IS INSANE THIS IS AMAZING!! " I shout.

" I will tell you everything late but I have to cancel on hangoung out with you sorry Sophie" he says.

"NO it's fine go have fun I'm so happy for you Josh" I say. I am actually happy for him.

"Can I ask you somthing real quick?" Josh says.

"Yes anything"I say.

"Is there somthing going on between you and Finn?" Josh says.

" what-" I start but get cut of.

"No it's okay if you are I think you guys would be good but brake up with Daniel first"Josh says and walks of laughing.

Shit.

(Time skip)

I'm in my room crying. I have nobody to tell me I'm okay. Because I know I'm not okay but I just want someone to lie to me and tell me I am.

It'd half 10 and Josh is still not home. He must be having a good time. Good for him.

I get up and walk to my mirror. I hate myself.

I take of my clothes and leave my underwear on. I look disgusting. I want to just be sick looking at myself.

My scars look so ugly. I should never show my arms again. Ever.

And all there bruises look infected it's disgusting.

And I look like a fat pig. I hate myself.

I stand on the scales. I'm 39kgs. Dad told me I have to be 30 kgs to be pretty but I don't think I ever will be. I hate myself.

I hate myself
I hate myself
I HATE MYSELF!

I start crying even more look at my body in the mirror. What if I didn't do any of this to myself? Would Daniel still want me? Would I be pretty? Would I be happy?

Daniel loves me.
No he dosent.
All he wants is the best for me.
All he wants is to hurt me and fuck me.

What do I believe at this point.

Then I hear a voice that makes me jump.

" Sophie.." Finn says.

" FINN! You scared me half to fucking death" I say trying to rush to put my cloths back on. " what the hell are you doing here finn I didn't call or text or ask you to come over!" I say madly.