To be Hated (ON HOLD)

6

Severus Snapes POV <333:

The rest of potions class seems to drag on for eternity.

After what feels like forever Slughorn dismisses us.

Everyone cleans up, chattering loudly and causing my headache to worsen.

"Sev?" Lily says softly, laying a hand on my shoulder.

I tense at the contact and she immediately withdraws her hand.

"Sev it's time to go." She states.

I nod carefully, my head still buried in my arms, then I slowly open my eyes and sit up.

The lights, although dim, hurt my eyes and the sickening leftover fumes from the potions waft into my nose, making my head spin.

I struggle to get to my feet and curse my self for standing so quickly when a dizzy spell hits me like a train.

I squeeze my eyes shut and grip tightly onto the table.

"You okay Sev?" Lily asks.

"Mhm." I say, strained.

I nod my head weakly then immediately regret it when I'm met with a sharp pain in my brain.

Taking deep breaths I open my eyes and pick up ny back, slinging it over ny shoulder carefully.

It set me off balance and I struggle to stand up straight.

With my cast and the heavy weight of the bag it's difficult for me to remain standing.

"Let me help you with that..." a voice mutters in my ear and the bag is lifted off my body.

I sluggishly blink and turn to see James Potter holding my bag.

"Mm. T-Th-n-sk." I hum.

He gives me a look that I don't bother trying to interpret.

I turn away and follow Lily out of the dungeons.

My head hurts.

We're halfway out of the dungeons when I feel something hard collide with my shoulder, sending me sprawling to the ground on all fours.

I hear laughs and curses and someone yell "Padfoot!".

But I'm too preoccupied trying not to throw up.

The floor tilts and my stomach lurches dangerously.

I don't feel so good...

"Sev? Severus?!" A voice breaks through my fading consciousness.

I glance up with watery eyes at a concerned looking Lily.

"A-Are you alright!?" She exclaims.

I try to smile as I feebly nod my head.

Then, however unwisely, I attempt to stand.

I'm almost on ny feet when my shaking twig arms give out from underneath me.

I collapse onto my stomach, grimacing in pain, my eyes shut tightly, and clenching ny teeth harshly.

Suddenly I'm gently lifted and turned on my back, my head resting up against someone's chest.

I squint ny eyes up at Potter, who looks down at me with wide eyes.

He stands up, pulling me with him like a rag doll, and picks me up bridal style as he did earlier.

"We should . . . Madam Pomphrey . . . know what to do . . ." A voice says.

I can't make out exactly who is saying it or what exactly they are saying, but I am much too tired to care.

A strange feeling overcomes me - like I am being rocked in someone's arms - and I groan in pain as it causes my headache to worsen.

The sensation lessens slightly, but it's still there.

I wince again and turn my head slightly, burying it into something warm and comfortable.

I sigh, breathing deeply.

Smells like...peppermint and grass...

I think wistfully.

Unlike earlier in class, when the overpowering smell caused bile to rise in my throat, this softer and more pleasant scent seems to take away my pain.

My headache lessens slightly and my stomach does flips, but in a way I cannot place.

It's not an unpleasant feeling, but I can't say it's a fully welcome one.

With the ever constant and slow rocking movement continuing, and the calming scent ever present, I slowly begin to drift off into sleep.

James Potter POV:

I enter the classroom after Snape, still stunned from his use of my first name.

I walk to the back of the classroom where the rest of the Marauders wait for me.

Peter and Remus are sitting together at a station so I sit next to Sirius.

"What the hell was that?" Padfoot immediately asks.

"Nice to see you too Padfoot." I grumble.

"What was that though? Why did you carry him down here, him. Snivellus. Our sworn enemy?" Sirius continues.

"Geez Pad, I just sat down."

He just gives me a look.

"Look ok, yeah I carried him, because he needed help getting down the stairs. It's not that big a deal."

"Not that big a deal? Who knows he might think you're friends now!"

"Would not hating each other really be that bad Padfoot?" I roll my eyes.

Sirius just stares at me with his mouth open before exclaiming "What!? You want to befriend Snivelly?!"

I raise my hands to quiet him and glance around to see if anyone heard.

"I never said that...I just think that, I don't know maybe I don't want to have a 'mortal enemy' when I leave hogwarts." I say, half sarcastic.

I didn't realize before but every word I'm saying is true.

I don't want Severus Snape to hate me, and I don't hate him.

I don't think I ever truly hated him.

Hate is a strong word.

"Do you fancy him?" Sirius suddenly says, very...well seriously.

"What!? No!" I whisper shout.

Sirius levels me with a hard stare.

The Marauders are the only people in the world who know I'm bisexual.

My parents wouldn't care of course, they would support me and love me either way.

But I'm just not ready for people to know I guess.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, Sirius." I say sternly.

"Are you really sure?"

"I don't know why you can't just mind your own business Padfoot!" I yell a little too loud.

People around us look in our direction for a minute.

But the one person that catches my eyes is Snape.

He's sway in his spot as he attempts to look over his shoulder.

He seems to just give up, seeing as how he simply closes his eyes.

After Lily returns, standing apparently becomes to much for him and he sits down heavily in his seat.

I can't help the spike of worry that runs through me.

He looks sick.

And so for the rest of class I watch with baited breath as he seems to get worse and worse.