White Liars

Chapter 18

Jen's POV

I paced back and forth, I was afraid he wasn't going to come at all. It was dark and I knew I shouldn't have been out. Not with everything that's been happening to my family lately, but I needed to see Ashton. I needed to talk to him, hear his voice feel his hand agianst mine, touch his soft hair. No Jennifer, your thoughts are drifting. You have to stay focused and talk to Ashton about all that has happened, everything.

I sat down on one of the small benches to keep myself from pacing even quicker than I had before. I sighed and looked at my iPhone, it said 12:10 AM. He wasn't going to come. He was all I wanted right now. If he were here everything would be okay. Sighing again I stood up and began to walk towards the beach and then back to the resort house.

I stopped short, I didn't get a good feeling about being here all alone. I pulled my phone out once again and began to call my mom. Before I even had time to think a shadow crossed in front of me and hit me in the head.Little did they know, my mom had already answered and was hearing everything.Then my vision went black, but I was still concious and alone in my sad world, not even able to cry out and not wanting to either.

***

Distant voices. Whispering. Jen. Jen.

My head was pounding. I think I fell asleep for a little while. After I was hit I stayed awake as long as I could but my head drifted off into dreaming. i strained to remember the dream, I had remembered it just a moment ago. If I could tell how much I remembered I could measure how hard the person hit me.

Voices again, it was like being underwater and hearing someone talking above you,muffled. But you couldn't get out of the water to hear what they were saying. This brought on new fear, an overwhelming sensation came over me. I felt like I was drowning.

I gasped for breath in my minds eye, even though I was fully aware that I was breathing perfectly fine. The feeling of water filling my lungs and not being able to get oxegyn, then came the silence. The unforgettable silence of my "dream me" dying. The darkness swallowed me whole. I couldn't see, feel, hear, touch, or taste. All my senses were turned off but I knew that I was in that darkness because that was all there was, that and silence.

The two were an unwelcome combination. My two least favorite things, accompanied with the recent trauma to my head and emotions alike. Questions filled my brain. Who? Why me? How did this happen? Where was I? Where was my family? Ashton, where was Ashton when I needed him most?

I wasn't drowning anymore, although I wished I was. I was feeling and I didn't want to feel. I wanted to turn it all off and just sleep. Sleep for the rest of my life. Sleep and never, ever wake up.

Betrayal, was what I felt. Why had Ashton left me alone on the dock? I thought that he felt what I had felt too. That easy comfort, the love without having to even say a word. Why had he left me alone to face the demons that surrounded me. I thought that he needed me just as much as I had needed him. I thought he loved me. I was wrong. I was so wrong.

Ashton's POV

I ran all the way to the dock. I couldn't breath well, but I didn't stop. I kept running until I reached the beginning of the platform. I saw red, I mean I literally saw red and an envelope with my name scratched on it. I didn't want to read it, I didn't want to know what it had to say. I picked it up from beside the puddle and opened the envelope.

Ashton,

You were a little to late. After I realized that I gave you both letters I had to go to drastic measures. Before you do anything stupid like call the police remember that now I don't only have your family, but I have Jen too. So underneath the bench to your right is a few cleaning supplies, clean up the small amout of blood and then walk away. Do NOT turn back and you were never there. I'll talk to you soon. Remember that I'm always watching, always.

~Nina

I didn't even think about what I was doing when I grabbed the cleaning supplies and started cleaning up the blood. I looked into the small puddle and didn't feel anything except about how betrayed Jen must feel by me. Then I walked away, doing just as the letter told me to.

The beach was completely empty and I felt completely empty. I didn't know where to go or what to do. I was stuck exactly where I was and that place wasnt a good one.

I took my shoes off and threw them in the sand not caring if I lost them to an incoming tide. I wanted to feel the sand between my toes and just lose myself. I knew the warning of the "beach crawlers" looking for everything and anything anyone left out on the sand to steal, but it didn't matter to me. I tore off my shirt and pants and jumped in the water.

I swam out a little and back in a little, and then out a little and in a little. I was sure I had been doing it well over and hour, but my muscles didn't even feel tired. I walked onto the beach and collapsed in the sand. I tilted my head up to the sky and watched the stars.

One of them twinkled like Christmas Tree lights and another was dim and looked burned out. The sky eventually became lighter and as the stars began to disappear that twinkling bright star continued to shine. I watched that star until it was to light outside and it disappeared with everything else the night held for me.

I walked to the beach house and when I got there, I couldn't get in because it was still a crime scene. I sat down on the side of the road not sure what else to do except wait. Wait and see what else the crazy Nina has in store and what her plan actually is. Wait and figure out my own plan to save the two things that mean the most to me in my life. Jen and my family. I was going to get them back no matter what it took. I'd do anything.