Malik - Z.M (Book 1, Malik Series)

45.

45.

My heart reacts immediately as I see Zayn in his well cut suit. Those eyes that could pierce me to immobility are vibrant, but distracted.

But, he's here. He really is here.

I can't contain my thoughts properly.

"Brother." Zaidan smirks.

Zayns eyes are focused dead on Zaidan.

There's nothing said between each other until Zaidan grabs his shoulder and pulls him into a brotherly hug.

Seeing Zayn now has somehow pushed my feelings away.

Fury, anger and pain suddenly takes over when I realise that he's shot my best friend. He took her away from me.

My heart contracts in my chest and I step away, only to bump into someone behind me, which causes both Zaidan and Zayn to stare at me as I apologise sluggishly.

I swallow.

"Alissa." Zaidan murmurs confused. "Are you okay?"

I nod. I hold my breath and stand next to him as Zayn's eyes pin me in place.

I can't ignore the fact that he killed Taylor, but seeing him feels like I'm alive again.

Zaidan shakes his head as a smile spreads across his face again when his attention falls back at Zayn.

"It's good to see you again man!" Zaidan smiles.

I don't want to come between them.

They're brothers. They haven't seen each other in a while.

I back away before Zaidan can notice I've disappeared, but his arm grips onto my waist and I bite my lip as Zayn reverts his gaze back at me.

My eyes drift around the ballroom.

I look down and squeeze my eyes closed before taking a deep breath.

"I'll let you two have a moment." I cut Zayn off without realising and Zaidan nods understandingly.

Skating my gaze around the ballroom, I grab an unopened wine bottle and make my way outside towards the lake as anxiety builds up.

Making my way past the pool and towards the lake, I sit down at the edge after taking my heels off and I sigh quietly as I open the wine bottle.

A tear manages to stream down and I take a deep breath.

"How could I forget he killed you." I whisper to myself. "I just wish things were easier."

I hold my bottle up and wipe my cheeks clean.

"Cheers Taylor." I raise my bottle before pouring a little in the lake and taking some down myself.

"I miss you." I say sadly. "I wish you were here with me. I don't know what to do."

I skim my feet across the water and take a deep breath as I feel my tears threatening to fall.

I don't know how long I was outside for, but I didn't finish the bottle. In fact, I think I only took three whole gulps and I had enough.

Being able to sit here by myself is keeping me at peace for now.

I'm worried about what Zayn is going to do if he sees me. I'm scared about what's he's going to say.

I don't even know what to say to him.

I'm angry and annoyed and sad about this whole situation.

I've pushed it away so much, I'm not even sure if I could go through with this. I just want to be alone.