Rain POV
It is Valentine's Day and I already can.'t get Marq off of my mind. It's no doubt that I fucked up. I cannot stop thinking about him. I can't stop dreaming about him and I let such a temporary feeling fuck up something that was supposed to be forever.
There was a knock on my door and I got up to answer it.
I have literally been isolating myself in the house. I don't have any friends or anywhere to go.
"Hey." Maggie screamed as I opened the door and I laughed.
"Hey." She hugged me.
" I miss you so fucking much. I've been so busy with school and trying to catch up and finish things off before the baby comes. Just trying to get my life together and I was going to call you, but I decided to just come over here."
"I missed you too. I have been hella lonely."
"Awe... Are you and Bahia at it again?" She flopped down on the couch.
" yeah, we had a fight And it ended like it always ended. Me being me. I am so sick of being this way, but it just happened so naturally. Everybody wants me to go back to being sweet and Rainee but I forgot who she was and I don't even know where she went. I just been trapped in this house overthinking everything and regretting everything. I should've just stuck it out with Marq. I ruined him, I made him quit his job, I took him from his family, he gave up his ball career for me and he was starting lineup. I told him I wasn't ready for that life or I didn't want to be in the light and he instantly said that we can get married and he can be at office man. I was just so unappreciative and this man would have given his life for me. You don't come by there every day. That is not something easy to find. Yeah now I know he's out there with another bitch, the bitch lives across the hall from me and as much as I want to pretend that he's been fucking her, I know he hasn't and I know he didn't he just isn't that type of guy. He's a great guy, an honest guy, a loving guy, and emotional guy, and nurturing guy, a loyal guy, and I fucked it up for someone who I don't even like being around. The thrill was fun, but this is not fun anymore and I'm pregnant."
"You're pregnant?"
"Yes and I don't want this baby but Jaiden already is excited about."
" listen let me tell you now you guys need to sit down and have a conversation because if you can't stand to be in the room with him, then having a baby by him is not going to work. If you don't want this baby you're never going to want this baby and this baby is going to ruin your life. I wish I wasn't so far along I will get rid of this baby, I don't know if it's Tom'e's baby or Calvin's baby or Tyreek's baby. I am praying and hoping that it's Tom'e's baby, but let's be honest. Me and Tom'e had sex twice in the last four or five years. I don't think he loves me anymore. I don't think he likes me anymore." She started to cry and she wiped her face.
It was making me really uncomfortable, I hate when people cry.
" my cousin told me that a man always love his first love."
" Well, that is some bullshit. Women always love their first love, men can move on and then treat you like shit." She snapped. " I should've never open the relationship. I did it out of fear of me, losing him or him cheating on me I'd rather him just be doing it under my radar. I fucked up by thinking that way because he wasn't even messing with anyone. I wanted to mess with someone. Me and him were two different people. I put so much hard work and time in to him and building him and making him and giving him a place to stay. I did so much for him and she comes around and she has it Easy and she makes his life so much better and so much happier. I was there during those bad times, and I had to navigate us out of those bad times. So yes, maybe I was a bitch and yes, I did try to change him, but I only wanted the best for him and it's like she brings the best out of him so naturally. It fucking irritates the fuck out of me. she's always happy go lucky and I wasn't able to be there because of the position that I was in and how I was raised. And he judges me for that, they both do." She wiped her face again. " so when I'm telling you right now, do not end up like me, pregnant and unhappy. Just get rid of the baby."
