Rain POV
I am so sick of feeling like this. I am so sick of always being the bitch. I wasn't like this before and I feel like the things that I've been through definitely made me feel like I have to choose myself over anybody and anything. There's nothing wrong with that, but I feel as though I took it to the extreme.
"Did he text you back." Maggie asked.
"No." I sighed.
" well, no matter, how upset he is, you had to do this for yourself. You cannot just have this baby and be attached to him forever." I nodded.
" I am just on a path to making me happy again. That's what I need to do because I'm not happy and I haven't been happy for so long. I feel like I've been living for someone else for the past 5 to 6 years. I am sick of all of this hardship and heartbreak. I just want a break." She sighed and rubbed my back.
"That is probably what you need. choose you in a more positive way. Actually make some positive changes in your life, you do not need a man to make you happy."
" I don't know I just feel like I don't wanna go to life by myself but I'm to the point where I'm willing to try any and everything." I sighed in defeat. "I just tired, I'm tired mean girl thing. I just need to find the old me. I know that I'm in here somewhere. I mean I wasn't perfect then, but at least I was kind. And I don't think I'm necessarily horrible. Now I feel like I just choose me in a lot of situation. The whole cheating on Marquise think was fucked up. It was a fix for a temporary filling now I'm ass out.
" maybe therapy could be some thing that can really help you get to the bottom of it." I nodded.
"I was calling around for a therapist a couple of days ago."
" do you want to go to the therapist that they are making you go to? She takes walk-ins and things like that but it's only depending on what her schedule is looking like." I nodded.
" yes I wanna call me see if I can go on today because my mind has been on a race today." She nodded.
" is it because of the picture." I sighed knowing exactly what pictures she was talking about.
Marq and my neighbor popped out on Valentine's Day. It crushed me, but what could I really say? I pushed him into her arms. Literally.
" hi how to take a full accountability because if we were together that wouldn't have been happening, and if I didn't cheat on him, we would be together." She nodded. "Let's just see about the therapist." She nodded.
Chris POV
"Dee what's up man? You walking around here depressed and shit." E sighed.
" I don't know, I don't think we made the right choice. I don't even feel like we were really growing apart. This is just so stupid."
" what's the problem?" I asked.
" she doesn't feel like we want the same things in life. She wants a kid in marriage and I do just not right now."
" if you are going to marry her anyway what's the hold up? U2 have been talking and dating and shit longer than anybody." E shrugged. " even before you got with Melody. You I have always liked her so I don't get it. She has every right to feel like it's time for you guys to get married because you guys have been together way almost 6 year. Chris is talking about marrying Nijay and they haven't even been together. I have a time you guys have been together. Me and Malika are engaged. now and the kids are understandable."
" and don't be scared to have kids. They are the best thing that has ever happened to me besides my partner." I explained. " they show you what real true love is in the feeling that takes over you when you have those kids is a feeling that is unexplainable but it's such a emotional and exciting feeling."
