𝐌𝐑 𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐄 | JJ Maybank

˗ˏˋfourteenˊˎ˗

I felt myself freeze in the spot. Seeing Rafe's gaze hardening and JJ's regret on his face.

I didn't know what to say. I didn't want to deny it cause I need to own up to my own mistakes. Besides, me and Rafe were no longer together so it really wasn't his business.

The Pogues seemed disappointed in JJ for calling me out like that.

"Really?" Rafe started laughing which genuinely scared me. "It's been what? A week since we broke up? And you're already sleeping with someone else?"

Kiara wanted to jump in again, but was pulled away by both Pope and John B. After all this was ours to fix.

"Got a problem with not being able to control her anymore?" JJ defended me.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?!" Rafe spat.

JJ just laughed at his face.

When Rafe didn't get an answer he pulled me to the side.

"What do you think you're doing?" JJ asked, being worried.

"Getting her to talk cause it seems like you feel the need to talk for her." Rafe replied.

"Nah I don't think so man." JJ argued.

I put my hand on my banging head. "No it's fine, I'll be quick."

JJ just nodded but made sure to keep an eye on us the entire time as Rafe took us to a more private place. It was near the sea, the water almost touching my feet as we sat down there.

Rafe seemed calmer now. Neither of us spoke the first few minutes. I just stared at the water that came closer every single time.

Before I became closer with the Pogues, I'd spend all my summers with the Kooks. We'd go far into the sea with a boat and swim there, we'd go diving and see whatever fish we could find.

I remember my last summer with Rafe, before he got addicted to hard drugs. We'd swim in the sea, he occasionally picked me up and then threw me in the water again, splashing water at each other like we were little kids.

I loved that guy.

I don't love the guy next to me right now.

The guy next to me had tried killing our friend, had been hurting me and everyone around me.

But then again, I doubt he can recognise me.

I was smoking weed a lot, something I wouldn't even have thought of a year ago. I was constantly around the Pogues, the people I would occasionally talk bad about with my Kook friends.

He changed, I changed. We changed.

In reality there was no 'us' anymore. I guess we have just been convincing ourselves there was.

Finally after a long time of silence, Rafe spoke. "So you slept with JJ? After we did?"

"When you word it like that it sounds really bad." I chuckled.

"Did he uh, force you?" Rafe asked.

I immediately turned to him. "What? No. I wanted to."

Rafe nodded. "Why?"

"Rafe you shot my best friend, tried blaming my friend for it and I was just messed up. I was so anxious about everything that happened and I needed a distraction, I needed something else." I tried explaining. Even if we broke up, it was a shitty move.

"Why didn't you just call me? Why him?" He questioned.

I laughed a little. "Rafe.. you shot my best friend.. you caused it. And me sleeping with JJ wouldn't change anything between me and him. Going to you would give you false hope."