Hi guys! This is heavily influenced by my recent tik tok which I used the audio ' Teenage Dirtbag' to in accordance to Maria Hill. Enjoy my loves !!! Also I'm British, so writing things like 'Mom' and 'Sidewalk' instead of 'Mum' and 'Pavement' make me wanna cry.
The summer was stifled with a sweltering heat. The air was stagnant, the heat from the sun was relentless. The grass had dried up from a luscious green to a stale yellow, the sprinklers had all been turned off to preserve water in such a cruel summer. But it didn't stop families from having water fights on their front lawns. Maria smiled walking passed her neighbours house, Little Lucy and her brother were chasing each other in circles with water balloons. Their dad came running out, chasing after them. Maria's smile faded slowly, watching their picture perfect family giggle enjoying their summer together. Lucy's dad held Lucy securely before pushing her up into the air and catching her and kissing her on the head, 'My favourite girl in the whole world, don't tell your mum' he said loudly, his wife pulling a fake hurt face at him before passing him a glass of fresh lemonade and placing a delicate kiss on his lips. Maria felt sick.
It wasn't so much that she was jealous, albeit that she was. It was the fact she was seventeen years old and had no memories of her summers being like Lucy's families. Maria wished that her mom would've died when she was at least seven. That way she might have had seven seven summers like this, her mom playing in the garden with her and her father laughing kindly at them. But she didn't. Her mom died in childbirth and she'd never heard her dad laugh. She walked past Lucy's house heading towards the cemetery, keeping her head down low. Her dirty Converse almost sticking to the melting sidewalk, the bruises and cuts on her legs from her previous beating from her father finally numbing down. She finally reached her destination.
"Thought you weren't coming, and what are you wearing?' Mellissa giggled staring at Maria's scruffy outfit. Maria was adorned with cuts and bruises, baggy demin shorts, a red and yellow striped top, a grey cap and white pulled up socks and her black and white Converse. Her unbrushed hair failing out off her cap onto her shoulders. Maria scowled at her, she couldn't afford 'cute' clothes like Mellissa's floral dress and white tennis shoes, but Maria blew it off. She didn't care that much, she was comfortable after all.
"Shut up. You got the stuff?" Maria raised her eyebrow, Mel smirked back at her pushing her blonde hair out of her eyes before handing Maria the little green bag.
"Come on" Mel giggled, grabbing Maria's hand and pulling her behind the church to go and smoke some weed. A few hours later they were both stoned in some random field, laughing about everything and anything. Maria loved days like this, days were she could forget who she was and where she comes from.
Mel rolled over, lying flat on her stomach hovering over Maria who was comfortable with her back on the grass, Mia grinned up at Mellissa before pulling her on top of her to give her a kiss.
"Mia! Not in public!" Mellissa scolded her before kissing her again.
"How can you tell me off like that and then kiss me again?" Maria laughed, now pulling herself up to sit next to Mellissa.
"Because I can" Mel smiled sweetly before looking at her watch, " Shit, Mia it's 6pm. I've got to go" she pulled away from Maria, standing up to straighten out her dress.
"Stay?" Maria attempted.
"You know I can't"
"Let me walk you home" Maria insisted
"You know better than that, Matthew might see you. He's sleeping over tonight, I'm so excited!" Mellissa began rambeling, Maria's smile having dropped at the mention of Mellissa's boyfriend. She knew that they couldn't show each other affection, it was the 80s after all but she couldn't understand why Mellissa stayed with Matthew. She hated being used like this.
"Why do you have to be with him?" Maria spat. She'd had enough of sharing what was hers.
"Maria-"
"No, it's not fucking fair!" She crossed her arms, her cheeks growing red.
"Maria, I'm not a dyke!" Mellissa shouted, leaving Maria stunned. Mellissa instantly regretted it. But it was too late. Maybe Mellissa wasn't hers after all.
"Fuck you and you're perfect fucking family. You ever say that to me again and I'll fucking tell them about what we've been up to all summer. How their perfect daughter is actually a lesbian!" Maria shouted, Mellissa's face contorted, both of them feeling guilty and sick. she knew she wouldn't ever tell anyone about Mellissa, but Mellissa deserved to be called out.
"Bye Maria" Mellissa whispered, tears coming out of her eyes. Maria never understood why Mellissa was always so sensitive, she came to the conclusion that Mellissa's family rarely shouted at their princess and Maria had been desensitised to abuse by her father for years.
The sky grew dark and the owls began singing their nightly song, Maria had no other choice but to go back 'home'. She tried to keep out as long as possible, to stay away from him for as long as possible, but eventually she'd grow tired and hungry. She'd stayed out all night once, waking up under a tree in the early hours of the morning. He hadn't even noticed she was gone, and instead reprimanded her for being in his face so early in the morning. She'd never forget that beating, and what he did after. Her knees stinging at the thought of being told to kneel over rice for three hours. The rice burning into her skin every second, leaving her skin bloodied and raw.
It was 1am when she finally approached her street, she wasn't high anymore but she was incredibly tired. Her legs having been worn out after all her walking, but she didn't complain. After all, who did she have to complain too? Nobody cared. She opened the door of their house slowly and carefully, making sure not to make a noise when climbing the stairs. If she woke up her father he'd probably throw another wine bottle at her again, she still had the scar on the back of her neck from the last time.
She approached her room and tried to turn her light on. It wouldn't work, great she thought. He hasn't paid the electric. She kicked her shoes off and threw her socks onto the floor and began to climb into bed, not bothering to brush her teeth or get changed. She was exhausted.
She closed her eyes to the feeling of loneliness. Praying one day her life would change.
