✓ sweetheart. [jake]

nineteen

Have you ever imagined how hard it was for one to believe her life is currently on an edge real quick ?  it's like everything ruins, her walls break down and all. She was speechless to utter out anything words.

She sat alone inside her office, staring gloomily outside the window. The sun outside doesn't shine brightly like yesterday. The cloud isn't bright in white colour as it is coloured with grey.

Soon, rain is starting to pour.

Watching the rain pouring makes her world feel heavy and such tight feelings inside her chest. She wants to feel nothing as the news is a bit too surprising to her but curls on her bed and cries all day.

To be honest, she didn't know how to break this news to anyone, mostly her family and Jake. So far, only Jay and Professor Kim know about. While for Jihye, Aein wasn't sure if the news had reached to her yet or not.

But when it did, she surely would attack her with tears, questions, and her disbelief feelings that Aein wasn't sure how to handle that kind of talk.

A soft knock on her door makes her swiftly turn to see the person coming in.

"Nam Aein, I have assigned a room for you." said Professor Kim.

"Thank you, Prof!!"

He smiled, "Doctor Kang, will be your personal doctor, and is in charge of your chemotherapy treatment,"

"Kang Seulgi?" Aein asked, and Professor Kim nodded right away.

"Yes, her. Your room number would be Room 143. You can go there now and get your treatment started." He added once more and smiled warmly at her before leaving.

Aein sighed.

She then makes her way to the room where she was assigned to stay during her whole treatment.

As far as she knows, she probably won't be an oncologist anymore due to her lifetime that shortened in remained days. Like she said, her dream got drained just in a blink of eyes.

As she arrived at the certain floor of the building, she went right away to room 143. Seeing Doctor Kang inside, she knocks on the door to get her attention.

"Oh, Aein-shi, you're here." said Dr Kang, smiling brightly at her.

"Come on in!" She said, preparing the machine and some injection.

Aein got inside the room and went straight to sit on the bed. Letting her back rest against the bed as it was in half-sitting mode.

"You know how chemo works, right? the side effects and everything?" Doctor Kang asked, wanting to have a little conversation with her junior colleague.

"Like getting a hair loss, yeah, probably." Aein, try to joke, as if it will soon happen to her.

Doctor Kang chuckled.

"It'll be fine, don't worry– and while you are on the treatment session, I suggest you might want to listen to some songs, reading books or have a sleep because it'll be boring since it might took hours." Doctor Kang explained, and Aein smiled at her.

"I'm a doctor too, I know about it." Aein said, laughing a bit as it feels weird to receive treatment from a doctor while she is also a doctor.

"Throughout the chemotherapy, i will come in and check your vitals and make sure you aren't reacting to the medications."

"Usually, nurses do this type of job for you, but since you are special one, I, a doctor, will do it for you."

"Thank you so much, eonnie,"

As the medication and injection start, Aein speaks up.

"Can you stay with me? i want a friend to talk..." she requested,

Dr.Kang then takes a small chair and sitted close to Aein.

"You know, out of many rooms we had in this hospital, I always try to avoid this room. But now they had installed one chemo machine here and also a normal patient bed– making this room vip only for certain patients. They made this room special to be in charge for me."

"So every special someone in that room will be my patient, and I have to take care of them." Dr Kang, opening up a story to have a conversation with Aein during the boring chemo session.

Aein was into her story, wanting to know why and more.

"Why would you avoid this room?"

"There's history about this one patient. Technically, everyone in this building knows her very well. She was a cancer fighter and had lived in this hospital and especially in this room, for more than 6 years–

maybe you haven't worked here yet, but she was really a special patient to me. I treated her like my little sister and would do anything for her. I was attached.

Soon, she finally rested. She won't have to suffer any of those pain anymore.. I can't believe that she's gone, I was in denial for a week. But i know i have a duty that needs to go on, so until today, I miss her still."

Aein, who was on chemo session, can't help but happen to cry after listening to Dr.Kang emotional story. What if one day, it'll happen to her.

Dr.Kang would be in another pain to see her patients leaving. She didn't want Dr Kang to be sad again.

"Hey... why are you crying?" Dr. kang asked , worrying.

"How will you handle the pain if your other patient leaves, too?" Aein asked out of curiosity.

"It is saddening. But life must go on, even if you're grieving. We can't do anything if it's fate, so let it hurt until it can't anymore. That just how i handle it."

"But if I leave too–

"I could save you, but if fate say it's time, then I can't. Even if you did leave me, life must go on no matter how much pain i would suffer or how i would be in grief most of the time. Im used to it, so don't worry about me. Okay?"

"Eonnie, you're really...strong."

"I'm not. It just how life." She then looks at the time, "I go get some food first, and come back to check on you. Is that okay?"

Aein nodded as she watched her leave.

Listening to Dr.Kang story,

makes me think about those people around me,

who are very attached to me.

Jihye, Jay, Dad, and Jake...

How would you handle the pain if I leave..

can you all live the same without seeing me?

for days, weeks, months, years, and so on?

if I could, I don't really want to leave at all.

I want to get marry, and have kids,

and to live happily with my loved ones.

I want a happy ending to my story,

Like a kid wanting to live in their fairytale stories.

I don't want it to end in misery, tears, and sadness.

But if anything happens,

life must go on for you all.